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"Did you ever notice that the first piece of luggage on the carousel never belongs to anyone?"
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Exlpore more Observation quotes

"A journey of observation must leave as much as possible to chance. Random movement is the best plan for maximum observation."

"The tedious never die, that's what makes them tedious."

"She was the most wonderful woman for prowling about the house. How she got from one story to another was a mystery beyond solution. A lady so decorous in herself, and so highly connected, was not to be suspected of dropping over the banisters or sliding down them, yet her extraordinary facility of locomotion suggested the wild idea."

"The tiny Lilliputians surmise that Gulliver's watch may be his god, because it is that which, he admits, he seldom does anything without consulting."

"How do you feel?He rubbed his stomach. "Like I've been eating Styrofoam."

"In fact, there are many uses of the innumerable opportunities a modern life supplies for regarding - at a distance, through the medium of photography - other people's pain."

"I'm almost afraid to tell you. Let's put it this way: clean toilets are the least of your problems in this country."

"His shoulder-length hair was a rich, dark-brown color with a slight wave to it and it flowed behind him as he ran into the center of the gypsies. He was tall, muscular, and so beautifully handsome, yet primal. He looked magnificent."

"Human skin hisses like a rattlesnake when it burns."

"She was a most wonderful woman for prowling about the house. How she got from story to story was a mystery beyond solution. A lady so decorous in herself, and so highly connected, was not to be suspected of dropping over the banisters or sliding down them, yet her extraordinary facility of locomotion suggested the wild idea. Another noticeable circumstance in Mrs. Sparsit was, that she was never hurried. She would shoot with consummate velocity from the roof to the hall, yet would be in full possession of her breath and dignity on the moment of her arrival there. Neither was she ever seen by human vision to go at a great pace."
Explore more quotes by Erma Bombeck


"My kids always perceived the bathroom as a place where you wait it out until all the groceries are unloaded from the car."


"There's something wrong with a mother who washes out a measuring cup with soap and water after she's only measured water in it."


"There are people who put their dreams in a little box and say 'Yes I've got dreams of course I've got dreams.' Then they put the box away and bring it out once in a while to look in it and yep they're still there. These are great dreams but they never even get out of the box. It takes an uncommon amount of guts to put your dreams on the line to hold them up and say 'How good or how bad am I?' That's where courage comes in."


"For years my wedding ring has done its job. It has led me not into temptation. It has reminded my husband numerous times at parties that it's time to go home. It has been a source of relief to a dinner companion. It has been a status symbol in the maternity ward."


"One never realizes how different a husband and wife can be until they begin to pack for a trip."
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