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"His lack of education is more than compensated for by his keenly developed moral bankruptcy."
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"They spent the first three years of school getting you to pretend stuff and then the rest of it marking you down if you did the same thing."

"If I show up at your house ten years from now and find nothing in your living room but The Readers Digest, nothing on your bedroom night table but the newest Dan Brown novel, and nothing in your bathroom but Jokes for the John, I'll chase you down to the end of your driveway and back, screaming 'Where are your books? You graduated college ten years ago, so how come there are no damn books in your house? Why are you living on the intellectual equivalent of Kraft Macaroni and Cheese?"

"It's hard for me to believe that people who read very little (or not at all in some cases) should presume to write and expect people to like what they have written."

"We ought to esteem it of the greatest importance that the fictions which children first hear should be adapted in the most perfect manner to the promotion of virtue."

"I don't think science is hard to teach because humans aren't ready for it, or because it arose only through a fluke, or because, by and large, we don't have the brainpower to grapple with it. Instead, the enormous zest for science that I see in first-graders and the lesson from the remnant hunter-gatherers both speak eloquently: A proclivity for science is embedded deeply within us, in all times, places, and cultures. It has been the means for our survival. It is our birthright. When, through indifference, inattention, incompetence, or fear of skepticism, we discourage children from science, we are disenfranchising them, taking from them the tools needed to manage their future."

"Graduate study is an intensive education. You have to be diligent and determined from the beginning to the very end."
Explore more quotes by Woody Allen

"If I could only see one miracle just one miracle. Like a burning bush or the seas part or my uncle Sasha pick up a check."

"I'm astounded by people who want to 'know' the universe when it's hard enough to find your way around Chinatown."
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