"I attend surprisingly few shows. The type of theater that is popular today just doesn't appeal to me."

"I am known to be able to take care of myself when I become angry. I don't mince words."

"I have plenty of invitations to go places, lots to do. If I'm not working, I go to have my hair taken care of and work at needlepoint."

"Christmas carols always brought tears to my eyes. I also cry at weddings. I should have cried at a couple of my own."

"Music, in the past few years... anything singable or understandable is square."

"I don't like to read. The only things I read are gossip columns. If someone gives me a book, it had better have lots of pictures."

"At one time I smoked, but in 1959 I couldn't think of anything else to give up for Lent so I stopped-and I haven't had a cigarette since."

"Everything's coming up roses - for me."

"I've made a wonderful living playing that theatrical character - the professional brassy dame."

"There's such a thing as theater discipline. One player doesn't appropriate another's inventions."

"I have been ambitious to be a somebody from the time I was 5 years old."

"My beloved Mom and Pop always rated tops with each other, and that's the way it will always be."

"Of my four marriages, the one to Bob Levitt is the only one I don't regret."

"I wouldn't trust any man as far as you can throw a piano."

"I'll pat myself on the back and admit I have talent. Beyond that, I just happened to be in the right place at the right time."

"At a flea market I always head for the junk jewelry table first."

"If I feel in need of sleep, I just open a book or turn on the television. Both are better than any sleeping pill."

"Eisenhower was my war hero and the President I admire and respect most."

"When I'm asked how to succeed in show business, I always say I haven't the foggiest."

"Legend has it that when God created me, he gave me a big distinctive voice, a lot of boldness and no heart."

"Mom claimed that I could carry a tune at 2 or 3 years of age. Maybe she was a little prejudiced."

"Once I had all the attention, all I had to do was deliver."

"Mom and Pop were proud of my popularity, but from their point of view, show business was no way to make a living."

"I preferred delivering my performance in person. I liked to be in control. You couldn't be in films."

"In my case, things have pretty much been handed to me."

"I was lucky enough to have the songs in my first show written by George and Ira Gershwin. Then Cole Porter wrote five shows for me."

"Always give them the old fire, even when you feel like a squashed cake of ice."

"I'll admit - I was honored to be on the cover of Time."

"I can never remember being afraid of an audience. If the audience could do better, they'd be up here on stage and I'd be out there watching them."

"My career at Warner Brothers consisted of one musical short subject. I was running around in a bear skin. Very chic."

"There have been people who have tried to take advantage of me. They want to be linked to me just because I'm Ethel Merman."

"I wouldn't change one thing about my professional life, and I make it a point not to dwell on my mistakes."

"I've never suffered stage fright. That fascinates people."

"Cole Porter had a worldwide reputation as a sophisticate and hedonist."

"My father taught me to read music and play the piano-but not well, even though people have said that I'm a natural musician."

"I've never cooked. I can't do much more in the kitchen than make a cup of tea and some toast."

"I was born in my parents' bedroom on January 16. The World Almanac says it was 1909. I say it was 1912. But what difference does it make as long as I feel 33?"

"When you are in deep conflict about something, sometimes the most trivial thing can tip the scales."

"I work as often as I want and yet I'm free as a bird."

"The slapdash way producers used to assemble a show seems a little unbelievable when we talk about them now."