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"Most modern comedy is crap."
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"Laughter is good for you. Nine out of ten stand-up comedians recommend laughter in the face of intense stupidity."
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"As if I'd had time to drug it in the two milliseconds she'd let me out of her sight."
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"I never watch comedies they suck if something sucks it sucks there isn't doubt about it."
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Personal Development
"Have a chocolate-covered raisin, he said."They look like rat droppings, said the Chair.The Dean peered at them in the gloom."So that's it, he said. "The bag fell on the floor a minute ago, and I thought there seemed rather a lot."
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Personal Development
"Why do we laugh at such terrible things? Because comedy is often the sarcastic realization of inescapable tragedy."
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"She's got feet like boats, whiskers like an American, and her undies are filthy."
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"You never heard of a comedy team that didn't fight, did you?"
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Personal Development
"Because it's uncensored cable, I think we'll be able to do the kind of sketch comedy that really hasn't been seen before. We can actually finish jokes."
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Personal Development
"There's always been physical suffering in comedy."
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Personal Development
"Partly because the town is just finicky, there are strange Catch 22 clauses in the consciousness of this community and one of them was that you, I found out, you can't do a comedy unless you've just done a comedy."
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"Most modern comedy is crap."
Comedy
"I've always had a kind of visual eye, and it was a pleasant exercise for that."
Exercise
"We only have one agenda, which is to make 'em laugh their pants off. Unless they are girls, of course, when it is to make them laugh their bras off so we can get a quick look."
Girls
"We had so much fun in Ghana and they are really lovely people."
People
"From the stage I've seen people of all ages absolutely roaring at really good toilet humour."
People
"I'm waiting for the time when I fail - because we all fail - and I'm ready, I'll take up carpentry."
Time
"I remember once having to stop performing when I thought an elderly man a few rows back from the front was actually going to die because he was laughing so hard."
Thought
"The most fun I ever have is sitting in with Rick writing, and we laugh at our own jokes."
Fun
"Performers like Tommy Cooper, who are always getting things wrong, are much more endearing than comedians who are sassy and smart."
Comedians
"I don't claim that our TV comedies are highbrow in anyway, but I think there's a basis to them, and that's why they're more popular than other TV comedies. There's a basis of truth in them, a gut feeling."
Truth
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