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Henny Youngman

"My dad was the town drunk. Most of the time that's not so bad; but New York City?"

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"My dad was the town drunk. Most of the time that's not so bad; but New York City?"

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Donna Grant

"To he who avenges a father, nothing is impossible."

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Personal Development

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Donna Grant

"I may neither choose who I would, nor refuse who I dislike; so is the will of a living daughter curbed by the will of a dead father."

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Donna Grant

"I used to annoy my father by telling him how much I felt luck was with me."

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Donna Grant

"Dad made it to Gold Shield Detective, so he always busted Robin, my oldest brother, and me. Always got caught, whatever we were doing."

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Donna Grant

"My father, who had previously been a civil engineer, died in the great influenza epidemic of 1918."

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Donna Grant

"I learned a lot in those first years in Miami, while struggling just for survival, by observing my father's fortitude."

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Donna Grant

"What I do now is all my dad's fault, because he bought me a guitar as a boy, for no apparent reason."

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Donna Grant

"The most significant piece of advice my father gave me early on about acting was, don't get caught acting. Really believe in what you're doing and then commit to it. Even if it feels uncomfortable, even if you feel that you're gonna look like an ass. It's all acting, but find the truth in a moment as opposed to just pretending you have and rather than trying to act your way out of it."

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Donna Grant

"I would ask my dad what he did, and he'd say, 'I listen to people's problems.' In some way what he did for a living is in my genes."

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Donna Grant

"My dad? He died when I was 19, which is a bad time for your dad to die, because there's an awful lot of things you have to resolve with your parents past your teens if you've been a difficult teenager."

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Henny Youngman
"Why do Jewish divorces cost so much? They're worth it."

Worth

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Henny Youngman
"That was the first time I saw a horse start from a kneeling position!"

Time

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Henny Youngman
"I've been in love with the same woman for forty-one years. If my wife finds out, she'll kill me."

Love

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Henny Youngman
"I take my wife everywhere, but she keeps finding her way back."

Wife

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Henny Youngman
"My brother was a lifeguard in a car wash."

Car

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Henny Youngman
"When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading."

Drink

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Henny Youngman
"I've got all the money I'll ever need, if I die by four o'clock."

Money

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Henny Youngman
"A self-taught man usually has a poor teacher and a worse student."

Man

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Henny Youngman
"If my mother knew I did this for a living, she'd kill me. She thinks I'm selling dope."

Mother

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Henny Youngman
"A Jewish woman had two chickens. One got sick, so the woman made chicken soup out of the other one to help the sick one get well."

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