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"I once dated a weather girl, we talked up a storm."
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"As ofttimes as it rains on my little spot of earth, you'd think I'd grow accustomed to the gloom."
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Personal Development
"Barometer, n.: An ingenious instrument which indicates what kind of weather we are having."
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Personal Development
"In fair weather prepare for foul."
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Personal Development
"There is no such thing as bad weather, only different kinds of good weather."
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Personal Development
"That most pleasant weather to feel is the one never felt."
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Personal Development
"The techniques I developed for studying turbulence, like weather, also apply to the stock market."
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Personal Development
"I'm a big follower and reactor to weather."
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Personal Development
"The wind at Candlestick tonight is blowing with great propensity."
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Personal Development
"But then, I just decided to get off my lazy butt and take advantage of the L.A. weather."
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Personal Development
"Wherever you go, no matter what the weather, always bring your own sunshine."
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"People read me but they don't subscribe."
People
"I went to the store and bought lady fingers, when I got home I noticed one of the fingers was missing so I went back to the store and the manager was nice enough to give me the finger."
Home
"I went to a urologist - he told me I could go at any time."
Time
"A guy gave me a job at an information booth - no questions asked."
Information
"After all these years I had the privilege of naming my private part, cause we have nicknames. So I named my private part pride... it's not much but at least I have my pride."
Cause
"I don't need to worry about identity theft because no one wants to be me."
Identity
"My father would take me to the playground, and put me on mood swings."
Father
"My whole family is lactose intolerant and when we take pictures we can't say cheese."
Family
"At Motel 6 in Amish Country I wonder if they leave the light on for you?"
Country
"My boss told me to get my butt in gear. I told him I was shiftless."
Boss
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