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"To make dollars from cents you have to have sense."
Author Name
Personal Development
"A drunkard would not give money to sober people. He said they would only eat it, and buy clothes and send their children to school with it."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Instead of giving money to found colleges to promote learning, why don't they pass a constitutional amendment prohibiting anybody from learning anything? If it works as good as the Prohibition one did, why, in five years we would have the smartest race of people on earth."
Author Name
Personal Development
"The price we have to pay for money is sometimes liberty."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Nothing induces me to read a novel except when I have to make money by writing about it. I detest them."
Author Name
Personal Development
"To understand someone, find out how he spends his money."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Egoism and Money [Goddess of wealth; Lakshmi] are very much at odds [have great enmity]. There should be just enough egoism to accomplish one's work. Beyond that, any expanded egoism and money have great enmity. Money (Lakshmi) stays away from it."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Money cannot buy you love. But it sure can buy you things that some people will love you for having."
Author Name
Personal Development
"When a fellow says, "It ain't the money but the principle of the thing," it's the money."
Author Name
Personal Development
"If advertisers spent the same amount of money on improving their products as they do on advertising then they wouldn't have to advertise them."
Author Name
Personal Development
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"Politics is just show business for ugly people."
Business
"Today is Valentine's Day - or, as men like to call it, Extortion Day!"
Men
"You're not famous until my mother has heard of you."
Mother
"You know what they should call this war - Son of Bush vs. Son of a Bitch."
War
"More coming out about Saddam Hussein. We now know he takes Viagra and he has as many as six mistresses. No wonder Congress is reluctant to take action against this guy - he's one of their own."
Action
"The Supreme Court has ruled that they cannot have a nativity scene in Washington, D.C. This wasn't for any religious reasons. They couldn't find three wise men and a virgin."
Men
"The University of Nebraska says that elderly people that drink beer or wine at least four times a week have the highest bone density. They need it - they're the ones falling down the most."
People
"According to New York publishers, Bill Clinton will get more money for his book than Hillary Clinton got for hers. Well, duh. At least his book has some sex in it."
Money
"CNN found that Hillary Clinton is the most admired woman in America. Women admire her because she's strong and successful. Men admire her because she allows her husband to cheat and get away with it."
Men
"The Bush administration said today there is a lot of support for us to attack Iraq. Exxon, Mobil, Texaco, Chevron, they're all lining up."
Iraq
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