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Christopher Hitchens

"If you gave [Jerry] Falwell an enema he could be buried in a matchbox."

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"If you gave [Jerry] Falwell an enema he could be buried in a matchbox."

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Amber Hurdle

"NIHILIST, n. A Russian who denies the existence of anything but Tolstoi. The leader of the school is Tolstoi."

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Amber Hurdle

"Hurry, your imaginary heaven is calling you up, my dear holier-than-thou religious nuts."

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Amber Hurdle

"And his computer's spell-check always forces him to capitalize the word "Internet". Come on; World War Two earned it's capitalization. The Internet just sucks human beings away from reality."

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Amber Hurdle

"Happiness is a good business these days, more you talk crap about happiness the large number of crowd you will gather."

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Amber Hurdle

"Blessed are the meek, for to them we shall say 'attaboy'."

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Amber Hurdle

"It is difficult not to write satire."

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Amber Hurdle

"Logically enough, the office and the nunnery have been singularly popular in the imaginations of pornographers. We should not be surprised to learn that the erotic novels of the early modern period were overwhelmingly focused on debauchery and flagellation amongst clergy in vespers and chapels, just as contemporary Internet pornography is inordinately concerned with fellatios and sodomies performed by office workers against a backdrop of work stations and computer equipment."

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Amber Hurdle

"Cervantes smiled Spain's chivalry away; A single laugh demolished the right arm Of his country."

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Amber Hurdle

"Pray don't talk to me about the weather, Mr. Worthing. Whenever people talk to me about the weather, I always feel quite certain that they mean something else. And that makes me quite nervous."

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Amber Hurdle

"Punctuality is the thief of time."

Explore more quotes by Christopher Hitchens

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Christopher Hitchens
"The struggle for a free intelligence has always been a struggle between the ironic and the literal mind."
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Christopher Hitchens
"Everything about Christianity is contained in the pathetic image of 'the flock."
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Christopher Hitchens
"I learned that very often the most intolerant and narrow-minded people are the ones who congratulate themselves on their tolerance and open-mindedness."
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Christopher Hitchens
"Beware the irrational, however seductive. Shun the 'transcendent' and all who invite you to subordinate or annihilate yourself. Don't be afraid to be thought arrogant or selfish. Picture all experts as if they were mammals. Never be a spectator of unfairness or stupidity. Seek out argument and disputation for their own sake; the grave will provide plenty of time for silence."
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Christopher Hitchens
"The essence of tyranny is not iron law. It is capricious law."
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Christopher Hitchens
"Beware what you wish for, unless you have the grace to hope that your luck can be shared."
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Christopher Hitchens
"If you say you're a unifier, you expect and usually get applause. I'm a divider. Politics is division by definition, if there was no disagreement there would be no politics. The illusion of unity isn't worth having, and is anyways unattainable."
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Christopher Hitchens
"Try your hardest to combat atrophy and routine. To question The Obvious and the given is an essential element of the maxim 'de omnius dubitandum' [All is to be doubted]."
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Christopher Hitchens
"Control over the production and distribution of oil is the decisive factor in defining who rules whom in the Middle East."
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Christopher Hitchens
"I had become too accustomed to the pseudo-Left new style, whereby if your opponent thought he had identified your lowest possible motive, he was quite certain that he had isolated the only real one. This vulgar method, which is now the norm and the standard in much non-Left journalism as well, is designed to have the effect of making any noisy moron into a master analyst."
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