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Rita Rudner

"A man will go to war, fight and die for his country. But he won't get a bikini wax."

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"A man will go to war, fight and die for his country. But he won't get a bikini wax."

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Amber Hurdle

"The doctrine that war is always a greater evil seems to imply a materialist ethic, a belief that death and pain are the greatest evils. But I do not think they are... All men die, and most men miserably. That two soldiers on opposite sides, each believing his own country to be in the right, each at the moment when his selfishness is most in abeyance and his will to sacrifice in the ascendant, should kill [each] other in plain battle seems to me by no means one of the most terrible things in this terrible world."

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Amber Hurdle

"Words of war, on a piece of paper. Where peace is torn off, crumbled and toss in the waste basket."

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Amber Hurdle

"What is the first thing we did when we took control of Iraq? Protect the oil fields. Remember the administration quote about how the oil would pay for the war."

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Amber Hurdle

"There are two things which a democratic people will always find very difficult - to begin a war and to end it."

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Amber Hurdle

"Those people who want to express their religious beliefs on public property should enjoy the same rights that we provide to those protesting the war in Iraq."

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Amber Hurdle

"In the matter of war, ask this question to yourself and to your own fellow country men: Have you ever seen any politician in your country without legs, without arms, without eyes after war? No! You can't see such a thing because honourless politicians always stay in the safe ports while they send others to the zone of death!"

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Amber Hurdle

"In any war, the first casualty is common sense, and the second is free and open discussion."

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Amber Hurdle

"To contemplate war is to think about the most horrible of human experiences."

War,
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Amber Hurdle

"Wars are, of course, as a rule to be avoided; but they are far better than certain kinds of peace."

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Amber Hurdle

"Eventually, I was sent to Wales and Germany, and after the war, to Paris."

Explore more quotes by Rita Rudner

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Rita Rudner
"I got kicked out of ballet class because I pulled a groin muscle. It wasn't mine."
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Rita Rudner
"Whenever I date a guy, I think, 'Is this the man I want my children to spend their weekends with?'"
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Rita Rudner
"The time you spend grieving over a man should never exceed the amount of time you actually spent with him."
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Rita Rudner
"My husband gave me a necklace. It's fake. I requested fake. Maybe I'm paranoid, but in this day and age, I don't want something around my neck that's worth more than my head."
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Rita Rudner
"Someday I want to be rich. Some people get so rich they lose all respect for humanity. That's how rich I want to be."
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Rita Rudner
"Some women hold up dresses that are so ugly and they always say the same thing: 'This looks much better on.' On what? On fire?"
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Rita Rudner
"Before I met my husband, I'd never fallen in love. I'd stepped in it a few times."
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Rita Rudner
"I love to shop after a bad relationship. I don't know. I buy a new outfit and it makes me feel better. It just does. Sometimes I see a really great outfit, I'll break up with someone on purpose."
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Rita Rudner
"My mother buried three husbands - and two of them were only napping."
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Rita Rudner
"I know I want to have children while my parents are still young enough to take care of them."
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