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Rita Rudner

"A man will go to war, fight and die for his country. But he won't get a bikini wax."

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"A man will go to war, fight and die for his country. But he won't get a bikini wax."

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Donna Grant

"They wrote in the old days that it is sweet and fitting to die for one's country. But in modern war, there is nothing sweet nor fitting in your dying. You will die like a dog for no good reason."

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Donna Grant

"That's my town,' Joaquin said. 'What a fine town, but how the buena gente, the good people of that town, have suffered in this war.' Then, his face grave, 'There they shot my father. My mother. My brother-in-law and now my sister.' 'What barbarians,' Robert Jordan said. How many times had he heard this? How many times had he watched people say it with difficulty? How many times had he seen their eyes fill and their throats harden with the difficulty of saying my father, or my brother, or my mother, or my sister? He could not remember how many times he heard them mention their dead in this way. Nearly always they spoke as this boy did now; suddenly and apropos of the mention of the town and always you said, 'What barbarians."

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Donna Grant

"You want war??...Out there you can find books, films about the war how brutal is it. If you disire for more... it sounds like you are cruel, so far I can understand it you are the bad guy, aren't you?"

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Donna Grant

"Om rubed his head. This wasn't god-like thinking. It seemed simpler when you were up here. It was all a game. You forgot that it wasn't a game down there. People died. Bits got chopped off. We're like eagles up here, he thought. Sometimes we show tortoise how to fly. Then we let go."

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Donna Grant

"War is what happens when language fails."

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Donna Grant

"America is the world's top war-master, the most sophisticated killer-culture in history."

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Donna Grant

"War on the other hand is such a terrible thing, that no man, especially a Christian man, has the right to assume the responsibility of starting it."

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Donna Grant

"At war, there's no right or wrong.Winner's right while loser's wrong."

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Donna Grant

"The evil we create during the wars to save us, it can also end us when the war is over."

Explore more quotes by Rita Rudner

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Rita Rudner
"My husband gave me a necklace. It's fake. I requested fake. Maybe I'm paranoid, but in this day and age, I don't want something around my neck that's worth more than my head."
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Rita Rudner
"I know I want to have children while my parents are still young enough to take care of them."
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Rita Rudner
"I was going to have cosmetic surgery until I noticed that the doctor's office was full of portraits by Picasso."
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Rita Rudner
"The word 'aerobics' came about when the gym instructors got together and said: If we're going to charge $10 an hour, we can't call it Jumping up and down."
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Rita Rudner
"Most turkeys taste better the day after, my mother's tasted better the day before."
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Rita Rudner
"My grandmother was a very tough woman. She buried three husbands and two of them were just napping."
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Rita Rudner
"I want to have children, but my friends scare me. One of my friends told me she was in labor for 36 hours. I don't even want to do anything that feels good for 36 hours."
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Rita Rudner
"My husband and I are either going to buy a dog or have a child. We can't decide whether to ruin our carpet or ruin our lives."
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Rita Rudner
"When I eventually met Mr. Right I had no idea that his first name was Always."
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Rita Rudner
"Before I met my husband, I'd never fallen in love. I'd stepped in it a few times."
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