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"The person I have admired the most in comedy terms would be Eric Morecambe, who is my total hero."
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"Have a chocolate-covered raisin, he said."They look like rat droppings, said the Chair.The Dean peered at them in the gloom."So that's it, he said. "The bag fell on the floor a minute ago, and I thought there seemed rather a lot."
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Personal Development
"Why do we laugh at such terrible things? Because comedy is often the sarcastic realization of inescapable tragedy."
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Personal Development
"I wear so many disguises on the show that only a real comedy fan might spot me."
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Personal Development
"One of my biggest problems with comedy was that I did not understand some of the jokes."
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Personal Development
"I hate comedy... Yo...-yo bitch."
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Personal Development
"Now, if you have never been hit by a flying burrito, count yourself lucky. In terms of deadly projectiles, it's right up there with grenades and cannonballs."
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Personal Development
"98% of all comedians feel obliged to be funny when interviewed. Less than 2% succeed."
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Personal Development
"Comedy to me has always seemed a social tightrope for the comedian. For all axioms intellectually sound the general public would prefer to be amused, but in those emotionally sound, it then chooses to get offended."
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Personal Development
"You need to understand that some comedy can have consequences."
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Personal Development
"I never watch comedies they suck if something sucks it sucks there isn't doubt about it."
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"The person I have admired the most in comedy terms would be Eric Morecambe, who is my total hero."
Comedy
"I am not, I repeat, NOT a lesbian - even though I'd like to be one when I grow up."
Lesbian
"I want to do something where I play Judi Dench's younger sister or daughter."
Sister
"It was fantastic to work in Cornwall partly because my family live there so I was able to do lots of visiting and eat lots of cake. They live all over Cornwall and all over Devon."
Family
"I never do any television without chocolate. That's my motto and I live by it. Quite often I write the scripts and I make sure there are chocolate scenes. Actually I'm a bit of a chocolate tart and will eat anything. It's amazing I'm so slim."
Television
"Turn up your radio. Watch lots of telly and eat loads of choc. Feel guilty. Stay up all night. Learn everything in six hours that has taken you two years to compile. That's how I did it."
Night
"I'd like to play a horse, many people think I already have. Either end of the horse would be fine."
People
"I keep my own personality in a cupboard under the stairs at home so that no one else can see it or nick it."
Home
"In actual life I am a grumpy old bag."
Life
"I have had the unfortunate experience of having someone write an unauthorised biography of me. Half of it is lies and the other half is badly written. My feeling is that if I'm going to write my life story, I ought to have my life first."
Experience
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