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Will Durst

"Men are superior to women, for one thing they can urinate from a speeding car."

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"Men are superior to women, for one thing they can urinate from a speeding car."

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Assegid Habtewold

"What Englishman will give his mind to politics as long as he can afford to keep a motor car?"

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Personal Development

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Assegid Habtewold

"The thing about drugs and sex is that you lose all your inhibitions. I've had sex in trains, planes, wine bars... and quite a few car parks!"

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Assegid Habtewold

"Having played many roles of scientific intellect I do have an empathy for that world. It's been hard on me because flying the Enterprise for seven years in Star Trek and sitting in Cerebro in X-men has led people to believe that I know what I'm talking about. But I'm still trying to work out how to operate the air conditioning unit on my car."

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Assegid Habtewold

"When you first get money, you buy all these things so no one thinks you're mean, and you spread it around. You get a chauffeur and you find yourself thrown around the back of this car and you think, I was happier when I had my own little car! I could drive myself!"

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Assegid Habtewold

"I replaced the headlights in my car with strobe lights, so it looks like I'm the only one moving."

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Assegid Habtewold

"Dogs feel very strongly that they should always go with you in the car, in case the need should arise for them to bark violently at nothing right in your ear."

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Assegid Habtewold

"I've tried everything other than jumping out of a plane, but nothing gives you an adrenaline rush like racing a car."

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Personal Development

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Assegid Habtewold

"Normal is getting dressed in clothes that you buy for work, driving through traffic in a car that you are still paying for, in order to get to a job that you need so you can pay for the clothes, car and the house that you leave empty all day in order to afford to live in it."

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Assegid Habtewold

"It bothers me when I hear it in a car commercial or some such. But for the most part, it's better than seeing sacred music relegated to the scrap heap."

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Assegid Habtewold

"I had a friend who was a clown. When he died, all his friends went to the funeral in one car."

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Will Durst
"I'm glad Reagan is president. Of course, I'm a professional comedian."

President

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Will Durst
"Comedy is defiance. It's a snort of contempt in the face of fear and anxiety. And it's the laughter that allows hope to creep back on the inhale."

Fear

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Will Durst
"How did sex come to be thought of as dirty in the first place? God must have been a Republican."

God

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Will Durst
"Men are superior to women, for one thing they can urinate from a speeding car."

Car

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Will Durst
"There is humor in the specter of the worst disaster in our nation's history. All I have to do is sweep away the debris of shock to find it."

Humor

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Will Durst
"I hate the outdoors. To me the outdoors is where the car is."

Car

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Will Durst
"Well, we won the war. You know what that means. In twenty years, we'll all be driving Iraqi cars."

War

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