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Henny Youngman

"Why do Jewish men die before their wives? They want to."

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"Why do Jewish men die before their wives? They want to."

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Donna Grant

"People talk about the courage of condemned men walking to the place of execution: sometimes it needs as much courage to walk with any kind of bearing towards another person's habitual misery."

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Personal Development

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Donna Grant

"Though bachelors be the strongest stakes, married men are the best binders, in the hedge of the commonwealth."

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Personal Development

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Donna Grant

"The men who followed Him were unique in their generation. They turned the world upside down because their hearts had been turned right side up. The world has never been the same."

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Personal Development

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Donna Grant

"A vigorous temper is not altogether an evil. Men who are easy as an old shoe are generally of little worth."

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Personal Development

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Donna Grant

"The doctrine that all men are, in any sense, or have been, at any time, free and equal, is an utterly baseless fiction."

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Personal Development

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Donna Grant

"There have been many great men that have flattered the people who ne'er loved them."

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Donna Grant

"Poor men's reasons are not heard."

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Personal Development

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Donna Grant

"Be noble minded! Our own heart, and not other men's opinions of us, forms our true honor."

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Personal Development

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Donna Grant

"All men are tempted. There is no man that lives that can't be broken down, provided it is the right temptation, put in the right spot."

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Personal Development

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Donna Grant

"He had read much, if one considers his long life; but his contemplation was much more than his reading. He was wont to say that if he had read as much as other men he should have known no more than other men."

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Henny Youngman
"Why do Jewish divorces cost so much? They're worth it."

Worth

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Henny Youngman
"I take my wife everywhere, but she keeps finding her way back."

Wife

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Henny Youngman
"A self-taught man usually has a poor teacher and a worse student."

Man

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Henny Youngman
"If my mother knew I did this for a living, she'd kill me. She thinks I'm selling dope."

Mother

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Henny Youngman
"A Jewish woman had two chickens. One got sick, so the woman made chicken soup out of the other one to help the sick one get well."

Help

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Henny Youngman
"Do you know what it means to come home at night to a woman who'll give you a little love, a little affection, a little tenderness? It means you're in the wrong house, that's what it means."

Home

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Henny Youngman
"If you're going to do something tonight that you'll be sorry for tomorrow morning, sleep late."

Sleep

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Henny Youngman
"While playing golf today I hit two good balls. I stepped on a rake."

Golf

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Henny Youngman
"If at first you don't succeed... so much for skydiving."

First

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Henny Youngman
"Why do Jewish men die before their wives? They want to."

Men

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