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Frank Carson

"Have you heard about the Irishman who reversed into a car boot sale and sold the engine?"

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"Have you heard about the Irishman who reversed into a car boot sale and sold the engine?"

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Donna Grant

"I hate fishing, and I can't imagine why anyone would want to hike when you can get in the car and drive."

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Donna Grant

"I will never have a drink and get behind the wheel of a car. It's not illegal to drink and drive, but there becomes a certain point where it does become a crime."

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Donna Grant

"One of my biggest problems this season was with the clutch at the start of the race. I hate to risk the car."

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Donna Grant

"Campaign behavior for wives: Always be on time. Do as little talking as humanly possible. Lean back in the parade car so everybody can see the president."

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Donna Grant

"In real life, one of my friends was killed in a car accident during our sophomore year."

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Donna Grant

"You know, it's amazing. I don't even have a car, would you believe it? I had a motorbike and it got stolen last year. So I've got to buy another one of those, I suppose. I can treat myself to that."

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Donna Grant

"I'd really like to get the girl, shoot the gun, drive the car, have fun. I even have these kind of action dreams, where I'm the action guy."

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Donna Grant

"I think that people don't know how to do anything anymore. My father was a janitor. He could take a car apart and put it back together. He could build a house in the back yard. Today, if you ask people what they know, they say, 'I know how to hire someone.'"

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Donna Grant

"What Englishman will give his mind to politics as long as he can afford to keep a motor car?"

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Donna Grant

"If you don't drink, smoke, or drive a car, you're a tax evader."

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Frank Carson
"Have you heard about the Irishman who reversed into a car boot sale and sold the engine?"

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Frank Carson
"So I rang up British Telecom, I said 'I want to report a nuisance caller', he said 'Not you again'."

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"I am accusing him of stealing my best material, he was a very funny man."

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"I don't think my wife likes me very much, when I had a heart attack she wrote for an ambulance."

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