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"I recently took up ice sculpting. Last night I made an ice cube. This morning I made 12, I was prolific."
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"The night creeps in by subtle degrees while a show of fierce colors attracts and distracts me. I look up, suddenly aware of remote lights scattered overhead. I gasp as the last streak of fire dies on the horizon, and I comprehend it all too late. That crafty, dark night has swallowed my world whole."
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Personal Development
"I'd still prefer to do five nights at a club than one night at Allstate Arena."
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Personal Development
"If it comes back, I think that Friday night is not a good night to be on."
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Personal Development
"Sometimes I wake up in the middle of the night and wonder how I do these things. I can embarrass myself so badly that I literally get a hot prickle down the back of my neck."
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Personal Development
"Bisexuality immediately doubles your chances for a date on Saturday night."
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Personal Development
"Stood off and on during the night, determining not to come to anchor till morning, fearing to meet with shoals; continued our course in the morning; and as the island was found to be six or seven leagues distant, and the tide was against us, it was noon when we arrived there."
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Personal Development
"I feel my shows are like a late-night talk show that we settle down and do every night."
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Personal Development
"It is always consoling to think of suicide: in that way one gets through many a bad night."
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Personal Development
"The two hours onstage is great. But I can only play a show and then take a night off. I have to sing for two hours, and then I've gotta rest it for a night. So it's the other 46 hours that are just boring as heck."
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Personal Development
"His mouth had been used as a latrine by some small creature of the night, and then as its mausoleum."
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"I love blackjack. But I'm not addicted to gambling. I'm addicted to sitting in a semi circle."
Love
"I'm a heroine addict. I need to have sex with women who have saved someone's life."
Life
"I know a lot about cars, man. I can look at any car's headlights and tell you exactly which way it's coming."
Car
"I drank some boiling water because I wanted to whistle."
Water
"Every time I go and shave, I assume there's someone else on the planet shaving. So I say, 'I'm gonna go shave, too.'"
Time
"Y'know, you can't please all the people all the time... and last night, all those people were at my show."
Time
"If my kid couldn't draw I'd make sure that my kitchen magnets didn't work."
Work
"All these jokes have been pre-approved as funny by me."
Funny
"I wish I could play little league now. I'd be way better than before."
Now
"I wear a necklace, cause I wanna know when I'm upside down."
Cause
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