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"Sweetie, you don't need to drive me to the brink of insanity... I'm close enough to walk!"
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"Where did you find that one?''I have no idea. I'm a magnet for crazies, I guess.''They must be able to sense a kindred spirit.''Your one to talk. Don't you have more hordes of the undead to lead in a glorious revolution?''Zombies not undead. There's a fine distinction. And no. Right now I'm scouting new talent. The glorious revolution comes tomorrow."
"I should curl up in a ball and cry. Instead i think about everything in the whole entire world that makes me angry - There is a lot, oh, there is a lot - and I start singing Justin Bieber at the top of my lungs."
"Don't panic. Are you sitting? You probably don't need to sit. Well, possibly. At least lean on something."
"Ma'am,' Augustus said, nodding toward her, 'your daughter's car has just been deservedly egged by a blind man. Please close the door and go back inside or we'll be forced to call the police.' After wavering for a moment, Monica's mom closed the door and disappeared."
"Be calm when your wife yells at you, calmer when she chastens you, but be terrified when she ignores you."
"Was it animal pee or human pee? Someone asked.How would I know? What, am I an expert in the study of pee?"
"Did you talk to him about it?""Oh, sure. Nothing happened, yadda yadda. The usual. But my maydar went off like crazy.""Maydar?""As in, he may be thinking about super hot sex with her. Like radar, only not as sure."
"And, whoa!" He turned to Mr.D. "Your the wine dude? No way!"Mr.D turned hi eyes away from me and gave Nico a look of loathing. "The wine dude?""Dionysus, right? Oh, wow! I've got your figurine!""My figurine.""In my game, Mythomagic. And holofoil card, too! And even though you've only got like five hundred attack points and everybody thinks your the lamest god card, I totally think your powers are sweet!""Ah." Mr.D seemed truly perplexed, which probably saved my life. "Well, that's...gratifying."
Explore more quotes by Tanya Masse
"We are often so worried about what is going to happen that we can't enjoy what is happening NOW."
"Too many of us spend too much time worrying about how long we are going to live rather than focusing on how we live. People cannot live forever, but memories can. Remember that with every breath and your life will change."
"Two things define you in this life. Your attitude when you are at your highest and your attitude when you are at your lowest. Sometimes you have to hit rock bottom in order to recognize and define what truly matters."
"Hope for the best,brace yourself for the worst and no matter what you're faced with, make a plan to KEEP GOING!"
"I don't need a personal trainer, I need someone to stalk me and threaten to kick my ass when I eat and drink stuff I'm not supposed to!"
"Taking care of yourself, taking time for yourself & rewarding yourself is NOT selfish. It's important & absolutely necessary!"
"Raising a child is a time of RAPID CHANGE! From the ages of 0 to 19, a PARENT can age over 30 years!"
"If you have something genuine to say to another person that would make them feel super awesome about themselves and make their day... SAY IT! The world needs more of that! But no fake BS... the world doesn't need more of that. No."
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