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"I've got the brain of a four year old. I'll bet he was glad to be rid of it."
Old,
Standard
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"In our heads we're all about 33 years old."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Old foxes want no tutors."
Author Name
Personal Development
"No one longs to live more than someone growing old."
Author Name
Personal Development
"I was too old for a paper route, too young for Social Security and too tired for an affair."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Of all ghosts the ghosts of our old loves are the worst."
Author Name
Personal Development
"I put a Phrygian cap on the old dictionary."
Author Name
Personal Development
"The Ancient Mariner would not have taken so well if it had been called The Old Sailor."
Author Name
Personal Development
"As any old Taoist walking out of the woods can tell you, simple-minded does not necessarily mean stupid."
Author Name
Personal Development
"It is only the modern that ever becomes old-fashioned."
Author Name
Personal Development
"The Helicon of too many poets is not a hill crowned with sunshine and visited by the Muses and the Graces, but an old, mouldering house, full of gloom and haunted by ghosts."
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Personal Development
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"Wives are people who feel they don't dance enough."
People
"In Hollywood, brides keep the bouquets and throw away the groom."
Hollywood
"I remember the first time I had sex - I kept the receipt."
Time
"I'm leaving because the weather is too good. I hate London when it's not raining."
Hate
"The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing. If you can fake that, you've got it made."
Life
"I must confess, I was born at a very early age."
Age
"Marriage is a wonderful institution, but who wants to live in an institution?"
Marriage
"I don't care to belong to a club that accepts people like me as members."
People
"Next time I see you, remind me not to talk to you."
Time
"The first thing which I can record concerning myself is, that I was born. These are wonderful words. This life, to which neither time nor eternity can bring diminution - this everlasting living soul, began. My mind loses itself in these depths."
Time
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