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Rodney Dangerfield

"I had plenty of pimples as a kid. One day I fell asleep in the library. When I woke up, a blind man was reading my face."

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"I had plenty of pimples as a kid. One day I fell asleep in the library. When I woke up, a blind man was reading my face."

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A.E. Samaan

"There I was, an 18-year-old mimic rooming with a blind whistler."

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A.E. Samaan

"I have to tell them that last night was a shameful train wreck filled with blind cuddly puppies."

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A.E. Samaan

"It's like a blind turn on a highway: You can't see what's coming, so you don't really know how to prepare."

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A.E. Samaan

"None so deaf as those that will not hear. None so blind as those that will not see."

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A.E. Samaan

"On my income tax 1040 it says "Check this box if you are blind." I wanted to put a check mark about three inches away."

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A.E. Samaan

"I've been on so many blind dates, I should get a free dog."

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A.E. Samaan

"Bogart could have been color blind. He got to know a man before he decided if he liked him or not."

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A.E. Samaan

"Violence and racism are bad. Whenever they occur they are to be condemned and we should not turn a blind eye to them."

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A.E. Samaan

"We have confirmed something we only knew in theory, namely that revolution, in which uncontrolled and uncontrollable forces operate imperiously, is blind and destructive, grandiose and cruel."

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A.E. Samaan

"Be blind. Be stupid. Be British. Be careful."

Explore more quotes by Rodney Dangerfield

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Rodney Dangerfield
"Most of the arguments to which I am party fall somewhat short of being impressive, knowing to the fact that neither I nor my opponent knows what we are talking about."
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Rodney Dangerfield
"I looked up my family tree and found three dogs using it."
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Rodney Dangerfield
"Acting deals with very delicate emotions. It is not putting up a mask. Each time an actor acts he does not hide; he exposes himself."
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Rodney Dangerfield
"We sleep in separate rooms, we have dinner apart, we take separate vacations - we're doing everything we can to keep our marriage together."
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Rodney Dangerfield
"I looked up my family tree and found out I was the sap."
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Rodney Dangerfield
"Life is just a bowl of pits."
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Rodney Dangerfield
"I found there was only one way to look thin: hang out with fat people."
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Rodney Dangerfield
"The way my luck is running, if I was a politician I would be honest."
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Rodney Dangerfield
"I saved a girl from being attacked last night. I controlled myself."
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Rodney Dangerfield
"If it wasn't for pick-pockets I'd have no sex life at all."
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