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"A balanced diet and a brisk daily walk will help keep you healthy, but there's nothing like a good-looking young man with a nice butt to help up your cardiovascular system."
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"Worry is a progressive disease that ruins one's life."
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Personal Development
"Exercise feels best after it is finished."
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Personal Development
"It has been known for many years that a subset of the population cannot tolerate the radiation emitted by transmitting utility meters and sickness results in these people."
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Personal Development
"Distress is a disease of the mind."
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Personal Development
"Health and happiness are interconnected."
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Personal Development
"Bitterness is the cancer of bones."
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Personal Development
"Living in filth is dark doom. The light of awaken leads to cleanliness."
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Personal Development
"Overwork can cause a break down."
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Personal Development
"An over-indulgence of anything, even something as pure as water, can intoxicate."
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Personal Development
"Every time you work out you strengthen your body. Every time you don't you weaken it."
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Personal Development
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"You don't need to be smarter, you just need dumber friends."
Humor
"It is far better to know the painful truth than to live with a kindly falsehood."
Honesty
"Today's problems are yesterday's mistakes coming back to bite you in the ass."
Consequences
"A wedding is no way to begin a marriage."
Time
"Absence makes the heart grow fonder, but tequila makes it so she doesn't give a shit if she's fond of you are not."
Irony
"Maybe knowledge is power, but it ain't nearly as as satisfying as punching some smart ass in the chops."
Irony
"When men age they're called sophisticated. When women age they ain't called at all."
Aging
"Dating--the socially accepted alternative to the rack."
Dating
"I'd love to go out with you, but I'd hate to deprive some village of its idiot."
Insult
"You are a perfect woman, a magical blend of beauty, intelligence, and spirit. Without you, my life is nothing."
Admiration
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