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Rita Rudner

"My husband gave me a necklace. It's fake. I requested fake. Maybe I'm paranoid, but in this day and age, I don't want something around my neck that's worth more than my head."

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"My husband gave me a necklace. It's fake. I requested fake. Maybe I'm paranoid, but in this day and age, I don't want something around my neck that's worth more than my head."

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Donna Grant

"It is the malady of our age that the young are so busy teaching us that they have no time left to learn."

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"It is not well to make great changes in old age."

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Donna Grant

"Rashness belongs to youth; prudence to old age."

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Donna Grant

"Hesitation increases in relation to risk in equal proportion to age."

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"He who has not the spirit of this age, has all the misery of it."

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Donna Grant

"Admiration of the proletariat, like that of dams, power stations, and aeroplanes, is part of the ideology of the machine age."

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Donna Grant

"To teach how to live without certainty and yet without being paralysed by hesitation is perhaps the chief thing that philosophy, in our age, can do for those who study it."

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Donna Grant

"No woman should ever be quite accurate about her age. It looks so calculating."

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Donna Grant

"In the age of the individual's liquidation, the question of individuality must be raised anew."

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Donna Grant

"Wives are young men's mistresses, companions for middle age, and old men's nurses."

Explore more quotes by Rita Rudner

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Rita Rudner
"Whenever I date a guy, I think, 'Is this the man I want my children to spend their weekends with?'"
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Rita Rudner
"Someday I want to be rich. Some people get so rich they lose all respect for humanity. That's how rich I want to be."
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Rita Rudner
"I love being married. It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life."
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Rita Rudner
"It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life."
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Rita Rudner
"Men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage - they've experienced pain and bought jewelry."
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Rita Rudner
"My mother buried three husbands - and two of them were only napping."
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Rita Rudner
"My husband gave me a necklace. It's fake. I requested fake. Maybe I'm paranoid, but in this day and age, I don't want something around my neck that's worth more than my head."
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Rita Rudner
"The time you spend grieving over a man should never exceed the amount of time you actually spent with him."
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Rita Rudner
"I don't plan to grow old gracefully. I plan to have face-lifts until my ears meet."
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Rita Rudner
"I think men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage. They've experienced pain and bought jewelry."
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