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"When I started I'd fly across the country to do a gig for a hundred bucks."
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"What the country needs is dirtier fingernails and cleaner minds."

"I do think the patriotic thing to do is to critique my country. How else do you make a country better but by pointing out its flaws?"

"The attack and our response show just how vital Arizona's military bases are to the defense of our country. We need to do everything we can to protect them."

"What do I owe to my times, to my country, to my neighbors, to my friends? Such are the questions which a virtuous man ought often to ask himself."

"I was brought up in Scotland and have always been a country person, although the town means a great deal to me, too."

"No one tells every white person in this country how to be. No one tells every Hispanic, or Asian or Jewish person in this country how to be. There is no single definition of whiteness or single definition of blackness."

"You all know the reasons which have impelled me to renounce the throne. But I want you to understand that in making up my mind I did not forget the country or the empire, which, as Prince of Wales and lately as King, I have for twenty-five years tried to serve."
Explore more quotes by David Spade

"Success? You can't get a big head about it. When people stare at me, they could be whispering to their friend, 'That guy sucks! Have you seen him before? He's horrible.'"

"I have no stories to sell. A lot of my relationships are with civilians, and no one wants to hear about those."

"I want to get back to my fighting weight of 98 pounds. I have the exact measurements of that guy from the movie, Powder. Right now, I am the reigning West Coast Powder."

"In grade school I was smart, but I didn't have any friends. In high school, I quit being smart and started having friends."

"It's just a campy blast. I just want to do as little as I can and make it good, and try not to sell out. I'm sure I will, but I'm just trying to postpone it."

"There are too many fawning entertainment shows out there and not one of them is making fun of it all."
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