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"The only reason I would take up jogging is so that I could hear heavy breathing again."
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"I take a very practical view of raising children. I put a sign in each of their rooms: "Checkout Time is 18 years.""
Time
"There's something wrong with a mother who washes out a measuring cup with soap and water after she's only measured water in it."
Family
"Don't confuse fame with success. Madonna is one; Helen Keller is the other."
Success
"Children make your life important."
Life
"A friend will tell you she saw your old boyfriend - and he's a priest."
Friendship
"A friend doesn't go on a diet because you are fat."
Friendship
"In two decades I've lost a total of 789 pounds. I should be hanging from a charm bracelet."
Humor
"Car designers are just going to have to come up with an automobile that outlasts the payments."
Car
"Never go to your high school reunion pregnant or they will think that is all you have done since you graduated."
School
"When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left, and could say, 'I used everything you gave me'."
God
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"Behind every effect there is a cause. You can never eliminate an effect without first understanding its cause."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Reason and free inquiry are the only effectual agents against error."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Man's life, as required by his nature, is not the life of a mindless brute, of a looting thug or a mooching mystic, but the life of a thinking being-not life by means of force or fraud, but life by means of achievement-not survival at any price, since there's only one price that pays for man's survival: reason."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Captain Vimes believed in logic, in much the same way as a man in a desert believed in ice -- i.e., it was something he really needed, but this just wasn't the world for it."
Author Name
Personal Development
"It's easy to get sidetracked with thoughts that involve much money and precious things, but before you launch into that mode, reason well."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Play with reason and doubt will close all the gates."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Religion is a distraction from true education."
Author Name
Personal Development
"The cheese-mites asked how the cheese got there, And warmly debated the matter; The Orthodox said that it came from the air, And the Heretics said from the platter. They argued it long and they argued it strong, And I hear they are arguing now; But of all the choice spirits who lived in the cheese, Not one of them thought of a cow."
Author Name
Personal Development
"For some reason in Spring Training, everything just clicked. You don't try to do anything in Spring Training but get ready, but things fell into place."
Author Name
Personal Development
"It's heartbreaking but we're trying to get over it. As disappointed as we were, I think that somehow you have to find a way to think that it happened for a reason."
Author Name
Personal Development
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