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"I could tell my parents hated me. My bath toys were a toaster and a radio."
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"My parents didn't really know one another."
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Personal Development
"When I was a kid my parents moved a lot, but I always found them."
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Personal Development
"My biggest musical influences are probably my parents."
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Personal Development
"I was very lucky. My parents raised me in such a way that it never occurred to me that I wasn't equal."
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Personal Development
"Certainly the experiences of Seth and his relationship to his parents and his point of view of the world are very similar to my own and very much based on my experiences at the University of Southern California."
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"When my parents separated, I was very grateful."
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Personal Development
"My parents always told me that if you want something, you can do whatever you have to do to get it. As long as it's not against someone else."
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"Usually I'll go to San Diego to hang out with my parents if I want to unwind."
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"I haven't actually spoken to my parents since the hurricane."
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"My parents own a restaurant in Albuquerque."
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"When I was a kid my parents moved a lot, but I always found them."
Parents
"I get no respect. The way my luck is running, if I was a politician I would be honest."
Luck
"I'm taking Viagra and drinking prune juice - I don't know if I'm coming or going."
Drink
"My cousins gay, he went to London only to find out that Big Ben was a clock."
Gay
"Yeah, I know I'm ugly... I said to a bartender, 'Make me a zombie.' He said 'God beat me to it.'"
Ugly
"My wife's jealousy is getting ridiculous. The other day she looked at my calendar and wanted to know who May was."
Wife
"I told my psychiatrist that everyone hates me. He said I was being ridiculous - everyone hasn't met me yet."
Being
"My uncle's dying wish - he wanted me on his lap. He was in the electric chair."
Dying
"We sleep in separate rooms, we have dinner apart, we take separate vacations - we're doing everything we can to keep our marriage together."
Marriage
"I saved a girl from being attacked last night. I controlled myself."
Being
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