"God created war so that Americans would learn geography."

Satire, God, War, Americans, Geography

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"God created war so that Americans would learn geography."

Exlpore more Satire quotes

"NIHILIST, n. A Russian who denies the existence of anything but Tolstoi. The leader of the school is Tolstoi."

Ambrose Bierce, American Journalist

Satire, Russia, Denial, Irony, Humor

"Hurry, your imaginary heaven is calling you up, my dear holier-than-thou religious nuts."

Fakeer Ishavardas, Indian Spiritual Leader

Satire, Religion, Critique, Faith

"And his computer's spell-check always forces him to capitalize the word "Internet". Come on; World War Two earned it's capitalization. The Internet just sucks human beings away from reality."

Doug Coupland, Canadian Author

Satire, Technology, Isolation, Reality, Critique

"Happiness is a good business these days, more you talk crap about happiness the large number of crowd you will gather."

Santosh Kalwar, Nepalese Poet

Satire, Happiness, Business, Irony, Truth

"Blessed are the meek, for to them we shall say 'attaboy'."

Christopher Moore, American Novelist

Satire, Religion, Irony, Humor

"It is difficult not to write satire."

Juvenal, Roman Poet

Satire,

"Logically enough, the office and the nunnery have been singularly popular in the imaginations of pornographers. We should not be surprised to learn that the erotic novels of the early modern period were overwhelmingly focused on debauchery and flagellation amongst clergy in vespers and chapels, just as contemporary Internet pornography is inordinately concerned with fellatios and sodomies performed by office workers against a backdrop of work stations and computer equipment."

Alain de Botton, English Writer

Satire, Religion, Office, Society, Irony

"Cervantes smiled Spain's chivalry away; A single laugh demolished the right arm Of his country."

George Byron, Scottish Poet

Satire, Chivalry, Country, Right, Spain

"Pray don't talk to me about the weather, Mr. Worthing. Whenever people talk to me about the weather, I always feel quite certain that they mean something else. And that makes me quite nervous."

Oscar Wilde, Irish Dramatist

Satire, Weather, Irony, Speech, Fear

"Punctuality is the thief of time."

Oscar Wilde, Irish Dramatist

Satire, Time, Loss, Truth, Irony

Explore more quotes by Mark Twain

"The man who is a pessimist before 48 knows too much; if he is an optimist after it, he knows too little."

Wisdom

"Denial ain't just a river in Egypt."

Truth

"Patriotism is supporting your country all the time, and your government when it deserves it."

Patriotism

"Such is the human race, often it seems a pity that Noah... didn't miss the boat."

Wisdom

"It is curious that physical courage should be so common in the world and moral courage so rare."

Wisdom

"In the first place, God made idiots. That was for practice. Then he made school boards."

Humor

"It's no wonder that truth is stranger than fiction. Fiction has to make sense."

Humor

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Exlpore more Satire quotes

"NIHILIST, n. A Russian who denies the existence of anything but Tolstoi. The leader of the school is Tolstoi."

"Hurry, your imaginary heaven is calling you up, my dear holier-than-thou religious nuts."

"And his computer's spell-check always forces him to capitalize the word "Internet". Come on; World War Two earned it's capitalization. The Internet just sucks human beings away from reality."

"Happiness is a good business these days, more you talk crap about happiness the large number of crowd you will gather."

"Blessed are the meek, for to them we shall say 'attaboy'."

"It is difficult not to write satire."

"Cervantes smiled Spain's chivalry away; A single laugh demolished the right arm Of his country."

"Pray don't talk to me about the weather, Mr. Worthing. Whenever people talk to me about the weather, I always feel quite certain that they mean something else. And that makes me quite nervous."

"Punctuality is the thief of time."

Explore more quotes by Mark Twain

"The man who is a pessimist before 48 knows too much; if he is an optimist after it, he knows too little."

"Denial ain't just a river in Egypt."

"Patriotism is supporting your country all the time, and your government when it deserves it."

"Facts are stubborn, but statistics are more pliable."

"Always do right. This will gratify some people and astonish the rest."

"He is now rising from affluence to poverty."

"Such is the human race, often it seems a pity that Noah... didn't miss the boat."

"It is curious that physical courage should be so common in the world and moral courage so rare."

"In the first place, God made idiots. That was for practice. Then he made school boards."

"It's no wonder that truth is stranger than fiction. Fiction has to make sense."