"If I had no sense of humor, I would long ago have committed suicide."

Humor, Depression, Survival, Hope

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"If I had no sense of humor, I would long ago have committed suicide."

Exlpore more Humor quotes

"Got a lot of sinful idears--but they seem kinda sensible."

John Steinbeck, American Author

Humor, Sin, Idea, Truth

"Laughter comes later, like wisdom teeth. And laughter at yourself comes last of all in a mad race with death. And sometimes, it isn't in time."

John Steinbeck, American Author

Humor, Laughter, Wisdom, Mortality

"Never stay up on the barren heights of cleverness, but come down into the green valleys of silliness."

Ludwig Wittgenstein, Austrian Philosopher

Humor, Cleverness

"Pessimist - one who when he has the choice of two evils chooses both."

Oscar Wilde, Irish Dramatist

Humor, Pessimism, Evil, Choice, Irony

"Pardon my French if you're a religious man.''I am,' Bill said, grinning.'Then get outta my cab and go to fucking church,' the cabbie said, and they both burst out laughing."

Stephen King, American Author

Humor, Faith, Truth, Wisdom

"Mr. Bennet, how can you abuse your own children in such a way? Youtake delight in vexing me. You have no compassion for my poor nerves.""You mistake me, my dear. I have a high respect for your nerves. Theyare my old friends. I have heard you mention them with considerationthese last twenty years at least."

Jane Austen, British Writer

Humor, Marriage, Family, Nerves

"The educated Southerner has no use for an 'R', except at the beginning of a word."

Mark Twain, American Author

Humor, Beginning, Word

"Love, n. A temporary insanity curable by marriage."

Ambrose Bierce, American Journalist

Humor, Love, Insanity, Marriage

"You can be a little ungrammatical if you come from the right part of the country."

Robert Frost, American Poet

Humor, Country, Right

"April 1. This is the day upon which we are reminded of what we are on the other three hundred and sixty-four."

Mark Twain, American Author

Humor, April, Fool, Day

Explore more quotes by Mahatma Gandhi

"Compassion is a muscle that gets stronger with use."

Empathy

"Be the change you wish to see in the world."

Change

"Even if the paradise of material satisfaction, which they envisage as their final goal, were realized on earth, it would not bring mankind either contentment or peace."

Politics

"Strength does not come from physical capacity, it comes from an indomitable will."

Strength

"The future depends on what we do in the present."

Inspirational

"Earth provides enough to satisfy every man's needs, but not every man's greed."

Wisdom

"It is the quality of our work which will please God and not the quantity."

Spiritual

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Exlpore more Humor quotes

"Got a lot of sinful idears--but they seem kinda sensible."

"Laughter comes later, like wisdom teeth. And laughter at yourself comes last of all in a mad race with death. And sometimes, it isn't in time."

"Never stay up on the barren heights of cleverness, but come down into the green valleys of silliness."

"Pessimist - one who when he has the choice of two evils chooses both."

"Pardon my French if you're a religious man.''I am,' Bill said, grinning.'Then get outta my cab and go to fucking church,' the cabbie said, and they both burst out laughing."

"The educated Southerner has no use for an 'R', except at the beginning of a word."

"Love, n. A temporary insanity curable by marriage."

"You can be a little ungrammatical if you come from the right part of the country."

"April 1. This is the day upon which we are reminded of what we are on the other three hundred and sixty-four."

Explore more quotes by Mahatma Gandhi

"Compassion is a muscle that gets stronger with use."

"Be the change you wish to see in the world."

"Even if the paradise of material satisfaction, which they envisage as their final goal, were realized on earth, it would not bring mankind either contentment or peace."

"Prayer is a confession of one's own unworthiness and weakness."

"Full effort is full victory."

"It does not require money to live neat, clean, and dignified."

"Strength does not come from physical capacity, it comes from an indomitable will."

"The future depends on what we do in the present."

"Earth provides enough to satisfy every man's needs, but not every man's greed."

"It is the quality of our work which will please God and not the quantity."