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Henny Youngman

"I played a great horse yesterday! It took seven horses to beat him."

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"I played a great horse yesterday! It took seven horses to beat him."

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Amber Hurdle

"I ride my horses three to four times a week."

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Amber Hurdle

"The only sport I'm not interested in is horse racing. That's because I don't know the horses personally."

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Amber Hurdle

"We also have 2 horses, but they're not allowed in the house."

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Amber Hurdle

"If wishes were fishes we'd all be throwing nets. If wishes were horses we'd all ride."

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Amber Hurdle

"Why is it there are so many more horses' asses than there are horses?"

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Amber Hurdle

"Even Crazy Horses is a good song, by the Osmonds. I've known many bands who have covered that. It's just a great song. I bought it in a brown, paper bag because I didn't want anyone to know I had it."

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Amber Hurdle

"I've had quarter horses for the last 18 years."

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Amber Hurdle

"I don't know if you saw the parting of the Red Sea with the chariots on the horses, I did stuff like that."

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Amber Hurdle

"I was one of the many horses pulling the wagon and couldn't escape left or right because of the will of the driver."

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Amber Hurdle

"I loved to get all dusty and ride horses and plant potatoes and cotton."

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Henny Youngman
"I take my wife everywhere, but she keeps finding her way back."
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"My wife dresses to kill. She cooks the same way."
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Henny Youngman
"When God sneezed, I didn't know what to say."
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Henny Youngman
"If my mother knew I did this for a living, she'd kill me. She thinks I'm selling dope."
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"Do you know what it means to come home at night to a woman who'll give you a little love, a little affection, a little tenderness? It means you're in the wrong house, that's what it means."
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Henny Youngman
"I once wanted to become an atheist, but I gave up - they have no holidays."
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Henny Youngman
"You can't buy love, but you can pay heavily for it."
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Henny Youngman
"My brother was a lifeguard in a car wash."
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Henny Youngman
"Take my wife... Please!"
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Henny Youngman
"My grandmother is over eighty and still doesn't need glasses. Drinks right out of the bottle."
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