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Jerry Stiller

"Creative comedy is like growing geraniums in a mine field."

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"Creative comedy is like growing geraniums in a mine field."

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Akshay Vasu

"98% of all comedians feel obliged to be funny when interviewed. Less than 2% succeed."

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"Comedy to me has always seemed a social tightrope for the comedian. For all axioms intellectually sound the general public would prefer to be amused, but in those emotionally sound, it then chooses to get offended."

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Akshay Vasu

"I'm traveling the world, ripping rooms apart with my stupendous comedy."

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Akshay Vasu

"I hate comedy... Yo...-yo bitch."

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Akshay Vasu

"You need to understand that some comedy can have consequences."

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Akshay Vasu

"Now, if you have never been hit by a flying burrito, count yourself lucky. In terms of deadly projectiles, it's right up there with grenades and cannonballs."

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Akshay Vasu

"You can't always go by the book, even in comedy."

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Akshay Vasu

"Laughter is good for you. Nine out of ten stand-up comedians recommend laughter in the face of intense stupidity."

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Akshay Vasu

"I am a comic writer, which means I get to slay the dragons, and shoot the bull."

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Akshay Vasu

"I consider myself a serious musician. Doing a comedy show does not take away from that in any way."

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Jerry Stiller
"Creative comedy is like growing geraniums in a mine field."
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"Money is sensual."
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"Being on a sitcom stops me from getting Alzheimer's."
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"We managed to hang in there. Today when people get married there's a tendency to run away when things get tough. There is a lot of strength in hanging together."
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"I ask myself why I do it. Maybe it's to prove I'm still around. It takes a lot out of my body. I'm not an NBA player anymore. At my age, very few people can handle it."
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Jerry Stiller
"It can make you sad to look at pictures from your youth. So there's a trick to it. The trick is not to look at the later pictures."
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Jerry Stiller
"I don't think my judgment is that good. I don't know what is funny."
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Jerry Stiller
"During the Great Depression, when people laughed their worries disappeared. Audiences loved these funny men. I decided to become one."
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Jerry Stiller
"The worst thing in this business is to be thought of as a no-talent."
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Jerry Stiller
"My father and mother - I figured if I could make them laugh, they'd stop fighting. I stole all their material."
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