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Tom Robbins

"Some marriages are made in heaven,Mine was made in Hong Kong, by the same people who make those little rubber pork chops they sell in the pet department at Kmart."

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"Some marriages are made in heaven,Mine was made in Hong Kong, by the same people who make those little rubber pork chops they sell in the pet department at Kmart."

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Akiroq Brost

"If it weren't for the last minute nothing would get done."

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Akiroq Brost

"And if I talk to him, I'll say something wrong, give something away. I can feel it coming, a betrayal of myself."

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Akiroq Brost

"God alert!" Blackjack yelled. "It's the wine dude!Mr. D sighed in exasperation. "The next person, or horse, who calls me the 'wine dude' will end up in a bottle of Merlot!"

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Akiroq Brost

"I always try to cheer myself up by singing when i get sad. Most of the time, it turns out that my voice is worse than my problems."

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Akiroq Brost

"When you love someone, you don't care that she ate your sandwich. You only hope she found it delicious."

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Akiroq Brost

"Looking for a wife is like fishing; before you go, make sure you don't have a hole in your net."

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Akiroq Brost

"Using a metaphor in front of a man as unimaginative as Ridcully was like ared flag to a bu... was like putting something very annoying in front ofsomeone who was annoyed by it."

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Akiroq Brost

"Some kleptomaniacs do not steal things only; they also, while some only, steal lovers."

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Akiroq Brost

"Eagles may soar but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines."

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Akiroq Brost

"Cleanliness becomes more important when godliness is unlikely."

Explore more quotes by Tom Robbins

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Tom Robbins
"If you want your tree to produce plenty o' fruit, you've got to cut it back from time to time. Same thing with your neural cells. Some people might call it brain damage. I call it prunin'."
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Tom Robbins
"Anarchy is like custard cooking over a flame; it has to be constantly stirred or it sticks and gets heavy, like government."
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Tom Robbins
"Love is the ultimate outlaw. It just won't adhere to any rules. The most any of us can do is to sign on as its accomplice. Instead of vowing to honor and obey, maybe we should swear to aid and abet. That would mean that security is out of the question. The words "make" and "stay" become inappropriate. My love for you has no strings attached. I love you for free."
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Tom Robbins
"Religion is not merely the opium of the masses, it's the cyanide."
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Tom Robbins
"If there's a thing, a scene, maybe, an image that you want to see real bad, that you need to see but it doesn't exist in the world around you, at least not in the form that you envision, then you create it so that you can look at it and have it around, or show it to other people who wouldn't have imagined it because they perceive reality in a more narrow, predictable way. And that's it. That's all an artist does."
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Tom Robbins
"You've remained on the battleground, center stage, experiencing life and, what's more important, experiencing yourself experiencing it. You haven't been reduced to a logistical strategy for somebody else's life-war."
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Tom Robbins
"In order to tame death, they refuse to completely enjoy life. In rejecting complete enjoyment, they are half-dead in advance - and that with no guarantee that their sacrifice will actually benefit them when all is done."
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Tom Robbins
"Faith is believing in something you know isn't true."
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Tom Robbins
"Gods and men create one another, destroy one another, though by different means."
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Tom Robbins
"It's never too late to have a happy childhood."
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