"I say, If everybody in this house lives where it's God first, friends and family second and you third, we won't ever have an argument."

Family, God, Argument, First

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"I say, If everybody in this house lives where it's God first, friends and family second and you third, we won't ever have an argument."

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"Father, I know you will hear me, I will speak."

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Explore more quotes by Jeff Foxworthy

"For the first time ever I was taking the family on the road. We stayed with my in-laws, which on life's list of experiences ranks right below sitting in a tub full of scissors."

Family

"I have never been jealous. Not even when my dad finished fifth grade a year before I did."

Father

"You moon the wrong person at an office party and suddenly you're not 'professional' any more."

Moon

"If you ever start feeling like you have the goofiest, craziest, most dysfunctional family in the world, all you have to do is go to a state fair. Because five minutes at the fair, you'll be going, 'you know, we're alright. We are dang near royalty.'"

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"Little girls love dolls. They just don't love doll clothes. We've got four thousand dolls and ain't one of them got a stitch of clothes on."

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"The more excited the rooster gets, the higher his voice goes. He's got a little bit of a Barney Fife quality to him."

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"Between New York and LA, there's 200 million people that aren't hip, and they don't want to be hip."

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"It's a weird sensation to be mad and learning at the same time."

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"You may be a redneck if... your lifetime goal is to own a fireworks stand."

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"My wife is so analytical with raising kids, and I am not. My feeling is if they turn out good, then that means I was a good daddy and put a lot of effort into it. If they turn out bad, it means they took after her side of the family."

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