"Newspaper readership is declining like crazy. In fact, there's a good chance that nobody is reading my column."

Chance, Fact, Reading

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"Newspaper readership is declining like crazy. In fact, there's a good chance that nobody is reading my column."

Exlpore more Chance quotes

"We are able to find everything in our memory, which is like a dispensary or chemical laboratory in which chance steers our hand sometimes to a soothing drug and sometimes to a dangerous poison."

Marcel Proust, French Author

Chance, Memory, Poison

"We now consider as fundamental economic functions of the state, many duties that were left a generation ago to chance."

Arthur Capper, American Politician

Chance, Now, State

"There's only one test of a great children's book, or a great children's film, and that is this: If it can be read or viewed with pleasure by adults, then it has the chance to be a great children's film, or a great children's book."

Chuck Jones, American Director

Chance, Children, Film, Pleasure

"With hindsight, we see that the Soviet Union never had a chance of world domination, but we didn't know that then."

Ken Follett, Welsh Author

Chance, Hindsight, World

"For the space of half a year, the gunpowder lay as harmless as sand, because no fire came near to explode it."

Emily Bronte, English Novelist

Chance, Potential, Danger, Delay, Time

"I don't give players a chance to hit me."

Eric Dickerson, American Athlete

Chance,

"Joint undertakings stand a better chance when they benefit both sides."

Euripides, Greek Poet

Chance,

"Improvisation is too good to leave to chance."

Paul Simon, American Musician

Chance,

"Housework can't kill you, but why take a chance?"

Phyllis Diller, American Comedian

Chance, Housework

"As Bill Clinton said so eloquently at the convention, during Vietnam there was a chance to serve; there was a chance not to serve."

Mark Shields, American Journalist

Chance, Vietnam

Explore more quotes by Dave Barry

"I am not the only person who uses his computer mainly for the purpose of diddling with his computer."

Purpose

"Fishing is boring, unless you catch an actual fish, and then it is disgusting."

Humor

"Auto racing is boring except when a car is going at least 172 miles per hour upside down."

Car

"Scientists now believe that the primary biological function of breasts is to make males stupid."

Now

"The world is full of strange phenomena that cannot be explained by the laws of logic or science. Dennis Rodman is only one example."

Science

"The Internet: transforming society and shaping the future through chat."

Society

"We journalists make it a point to know very little about an extremely wide variety of topics; this is how we stay objective."

Society

"Dogs feel very strongly that they should always go with you in the car, in case the need should arise for them to bark violently at nothing right in your ear."

Car

"My problem with chess was that all my pieces wanted to end the game as soon as possible."

Humor

"I have been a gigantic Rolling Stones fan since approximately the Spanish-American War."

War