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"He's going to jail. He can't see. He can't hear. He can't take a leak that lasts under fifteen minutes. But he has an erection and all the other problems are small change. Next time around I'm coming back as a man. Priorities are clearly defined. Life is simple."
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"Once a woman goes over 25, she prioritizes 'financial security' in a potential lover. Love and good looks are just a bonus."
"The only thing they valued higher than ammunition were Man United footballs."
"When you rearrange, make it meaningful and significant. Don't rearrange just for the sake of rearranging. It would be as "pointless as rearranging the chairs on the deck of the Titanic. In other words, why waste your time on frivolous activities which could be easily undone or do nothing to contribute to the solution of your problem?"
"Only you can know the difference between your wants and your needs, and your sacrifice of your life's time to both."
"Do not pursue what you cannot keep."
"It's all about 'Priorities'. There's No Such Thing as 'Busy'."
"One of the very worst uses of time is to do something very well that need not to be done at all."
"If you say that getting the money is the most important thing, you'll spend your life completely wasting your time. You'll be doing things you don't like doing in order to go on living, that is to go on doing thing you don't like doing, which is stupid."
"You can only take too much in pursuit of something you don't really want."
"There are a lot of things in life other than having sex, but none of them worth wasting a minute."
Explore more quotes by Janet Evanovich
"I'd spent a night with Ranger a while ago, and I knew what happened when he was encouraged. Ranger knew how to make a woman want him. Ranger was magic."
"You never want to look in a mirror,' Lula said. 'Men love mirrors. They look at themselves doing the deed and they see Rex the Wonder Horse. Women look at themselves and think they need to renew their membership at the gym."
"That's why I'm not on social media. People are way too open about their private lives. I don't need to see pictures of what somebody had for lunch or hear about how difficult their last bowel movement was or see on a map where they were when either one happened."
"On the bright side, I'm sure this isn't the last time you'll ever get firebombed, so maybe you'll have better luck next time."
"My father hired you to protect me,' Ahmed said, 'not to go off chasing men.' Grandma leaned forward, keeping her eye on the Taurus. 'We think this guy killed Fred.' 'Who's Fred?' 'My uncle,' I told him. 'He's married to Mabel.' 'Ah so you're avenging a murder in the family. This is a good thing."
"I don't believe this,' Diesel said. 'It just gets worse and worse. Bad I enough I have to play cupid to a butcher, button maker and veterinarian...now have to be sex therapist for a guy who gives people a rash."
"I don't have a lot of domestic instincts,' Ranger said to me, his attention fixing on the unidentifiable glob in my hair, 'but I have a real strong urge to take you home and hose you down.'I went dry mouth. Connie bit into her lower lip, and Lula fanned herself with a file."
"Ranger 'How's your mental health?' he asked. 'I heard about Soder.'Stephanie 'I'm rattled.''I have a cure.'Oh, boy.He put the truck in gear and headed for the exit. 'I know what you're thinking,' he said. 'And that wasn't where I was going. I was going to suggest work.''I knew that.'He looked over at me and grinned. 'You want me bad.'I did. God help me."
"I don't get writer's block because I don't believe in it. I believe you sit in front of the computer and force your fingers to get something on the screen."
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