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Joey Adams

"A psychiatrist asks a lot of expensive questions your wife asks for nothing."

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"A psychiatrist asks a lot of expensive questions your wife asks for nothing."

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Akiroq Brost

"What a kid I got, I told him about the birds and the bee and he told me about the butcher and my wife."

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"And I'm as attached to my wife as anybody can be to another human being."

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"We can't thank Dave enough. He could call me if my wife was about to have a baby and tell me he needed tonight for his show and I'd find some way to get her to let me head to New York."

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"My wife and I have always trusted each other, and I have to thank her strength."

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"Never be unfaithful to a lover, except with your wife."

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Akiroq Brost

"A successful woman preacher was once asked what special obstacles have you met as a woman in the ministry? Not one, she answered, except the lack of a minister's wife."

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Akiroq Brost

"My wife and I, we like to ride where there's not much traffic."

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Akiroq Brost

"My former wife is a truly wonderful person."

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Akiroq Brost

"I told my wife the truth. I told her I was seeing a psychiatrist. Then she told me the truth: that she was seeing a psychiatrist, two plumbers, and a bartender."

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Akiroq Brost

"I guess the worst day I have had was when I had to stand up in rehab in front of my wife and daughter and say 'Hi, my name is Sam and I am an addict.'"

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Joey Adams
"Never let a fool kiss you, or a kiss fool you."
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"Do not worry about avoiding temptation. As you grow older it will avoid you."
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"The difference between playing the stock market and the horses is that one of the horses must win."
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"If it weren't for the fact that the TV set and the refrigerator are so far apart, some of us wouldn't get any exercise at all."
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"People are still willing to do an honest day's work. The trouble is they want a week's pay for it."
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"Smack your child every day. If you don't know why - he does."
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"Rockefeller once explained the secret of success. 'Get up early, work late - and strike oil.'"
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"If you break 100, watch your golf. If you break 80, watch your business."
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Joey Adams
"Marriage is give and take. You'd better give it to her or she'll take it anyway."
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Joey Adams
"A psychiatrist asks a lot of expensive questions your wife asks for nothing."
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