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Joey Adams

"A psychiatrist asks a lot of expensive questions your wife asks for nothing."

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"A psychiatrist asks a lot of expensive questions your wife asks for nothing."

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Amber Hurdle

"And I'm as attached to my wife as anybody can be to another human being."

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Amber Hurdle

"I'm not a real movie star. I've still got the same wife I started out with twenty-eight years ago."

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Amber Hurdle

"I am a quick study - I can memorize a script in an hour - but I can't remember a name three seconds. I've even forgotten my wife's name on occasion."

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Amber Hurdle

"The greatest king of Israel, King David, the author of the Psalms, sent a man out to die in battle so that he could sleep with his wife."

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Amber Hurdle

"He knows little, who will tell his wife all he knows."

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Amber Hurdle

"If you would have a good wife, marry one who has been a good daughter."

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Amber Hurdle

"A man's best fortune, or his worst, is his wife."

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Amber Hurdle

"If a composer has a nice wife and some nice children, how can he let the children starve on his dissonances?"

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Amber Hurdle

"You know, grieve your wife, this is an impulsive thing and you have no idea the kind of trouble you're getting yourself into it. And of course he doesn't listen to me and he adopts this child."

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Amber Hurdle

"I don't think my wife likes me very much, when I had a heart attack she wrote for an ambulance."

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Joey Adams
"Do not worry about avoiding temptation. As you grow older it will avoid you."
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"People are still willing to do an honest day's work. The trouble is they want a week's pay for it."
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"Marriage is give and take. You'd better give it to her or she'll take it anyway."
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"The difference between playing the stock market and the horses is that one of the horses must win."
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"If you break 100, watch your golf. If you break 80, watch your business."
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"Smack your child every day. If you don't know why - he does."
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Joey Adams
"If it weren't for the fact that the TV set and the refrigerator are so far apart, some of us wouldn't get any exercise at all."
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"Rockefeller once explained the secret of success. 'Get up early, work late - and strike oil.'"
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"Never let a fool kiss you, or a kiss fool you."
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Joey Adams
"A psychiatrist asks a lot of expensive questions your wife asks for nothing."
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