top of page
.png){kind=small}
"Ever notice how irons have a setting for permanent press? I don't get it."
Standard
Customized
Exlpore more Press quotes
"Were you to read the British press today, you would learn that the British Empire never forgets its defeats."
"What it means is that some of Charles' press secretaries have been better than others as some of the Queen's press secretaries have been better than others."
"Washington is the only city in the world where you can go to a black-tie dinner and there at the foot of the table is a television set up to catch a press conference."
"The press is like a big bass, you just stick a hook in their mouth and they'll take it."
"Well, they didn't lack for topics after Hiroshima. Why should 9/11 slow them down? I know it got a lot of press, but it's just a few large buildings and aircraft, it's not like D-Day and the Seige of Berlin."
"If you press me to say why I loved him, I can say no more than because he was he, and I was I."
"The press briefing today I believe has lost much of its usefulness."
"I don't like everybody knowing what I'm doing, unless it's related to a movie. I don't like speaking to the press. I never did."
Explore more quotes by Steven Wright
"The Bermuda Triangle got tired of warm weather. It moved to Alaska. Now Santa Claus is missing."
"I went down the street to the 24-hour grocery. When I got there, the guy was locking the front door. I said, 'Hey, the sign says you're open 24 hours.' He said, 'Yes, but not in a row.'"
"I remember when the candle shop burned down. Everyone stood around singing 'Happy Birthday.'"
"Do you think that when they asked George Washington for ID that he just whipped out a quarter?"
"If it's a penny for your thoughts and you put in your two cents worth, then someone, somewhere is making a penny."
bottom of page