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"I don't know whether to toss you through that window or shake your hand and say 'Well done'" Henry said in a tired voice."
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"Laughter can deflate almost any problem down to its proper size."
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Personal Development
"The main difference between a cat and a lie is that a cat only has nine lives."
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Personal Development
"The Rum Tum Tugger is a Curious Cat:If you offer him pheasant he would rather have grouse.If you put him in a house he would much prefer a flat,If you put him in a flat then he'd rather have a house.If you set him on a mouse then he only wants a rat,If you set him on a rat then he'd rather chase a mouse.Yes the Rum Tum Tugger is a Curious Cat -And there isn't any call for me to shout it:For he will doAs he do doAnd there's no doing anything about it!"
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Personal Development
"When you're lost in space, it's time to buy some new furniture!"
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Personal Development
"If you have to explain your sense of humor, then you are performing for the wrong crowd."
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Personal Development
"For a man seldom thinks with more earnestness of anything than he does of his dinner."
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Personal Development
"It's a terrible thing for a man when his woman gangs up on him wi' a toad."
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Personal Development
"You won't enjoy it," sighed Crowley. "It's been in the car for more than a fortnight." A heavy bass beat began to thump through the Bentley as they sped past Heathrow. Aziraphale's brow furrowed. "I don't recognize this," he said. "What is it?" "It's Tchaikovsky's 'Another One Bites the Dust'," said Crowley, closing his eyes as they went through Slough. To while away the time as they crossed the sleeping Chilterns, they also listened to William Byrd's "We Are the Champions" and Beethoven's "I Want To Break Free." Neither were as good as Vaughan Williams's "Fat-Bottomed Girls."
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Personal Development
"Texan starting eternity: I never dreamed heaven would be so much like Texas. companion: Who said this was heaven?"
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Personal Development
"How hard can writing be? After all, most of the words are going to be 'and,' 'the,' and 'I,' and 'it,' and so on, and there's a huge number to choose from, so a lot of the work has been done for you."
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"Billie laughed at that, full and throaty, and once again she became so incandescently beautiful that George was half-tempted to throw a blanket over her, just to stop anyone else from wanting her."
Beauty
"I very specifically told you to stay away from Ned Blydon.""I chose not to follow your advice. Ned is a very nice person. Handsome, personable-a perfect escort.""That is precisely why I wanted you to keep him at arm's length."
Relationship
"And if that weren't bad enough, the next sound he heard was a loud click.The damned woman had locked him out. She'd taken all the food and locked him out."You'll pay for this!" he yelled at the door."Do be quiet," came the muffled reply. "I'm eating."
Humor
"It's the curse of motherhood. You're required to love us even when we vex you."
Motherhood
"Suddenly it was too hard to be in his presence, too painful to know that he would belong to someone else."
Love
"Would you care to dance? he blurted. "Now? She smiled adorably. "Is there music? There wasn't. It was some testament to how foolish in love he'd become that he did not even feel embarrassed."
Romance
"He smacked the heel of his hand against his forhead, as if that could knock the mental picture out of his head. Hell, he though irritably, he didn't want to knock the image just out of his head. He wanted to send it clear across the room and out the window."
Mind
"Not that I knew who you were until last month. But now that I've got you, I'm not letting you go.""You're not?"Blake stared at her in irritated confusion. What was her game? "Do you think I'm an idiot?" he spat out."No," she said. "I've just escaped from a den of idiots, so I'm well familiar with the breed, and you're something else entirely. I am, however, hoping you're not a terribly good shot."
Relationship
"Love's about finding the one person who makes your heart complete. Who makes you a better person than you ever dreamed you could be. Its about looking in the eyes of your wife and knowing all the way to your bones that she's simply the best person you've ever known."
Love
"James started to laugh. His chin hurt where she'd smacked him twice, his foot throbbed where she'd stepped on it, and his entire body felt as if he'd swum through a rosebush, which wasn't as far off the truth as it sounded. Yet still he started to laugh."
Humor
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