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"Once you leave out all the bullshit they teach you in school, life gets really simple."
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"The condition you're in at this moment is the product of your previous thoughts, to change your condition, change your thoughts."
Personal Development
"A full mind is unlucky if a good idea comes to enter inside, an empty mind is unlucky if a bad idea comes to enter inside!"
"Anything that ends is a dream. This whole universe is a dream."
"A wise quote can only change a wise man! Therefore, wise sayings are for the wise men, not for the fools! The sunflowers turn their face toward the Sun, the fools, toward the darkness!"
"Simple things have greater power than the complicated things!"
"Don't ever rule out the option of U-turn in your life, because one day you will need it! The moment you realize that you are going to the wrong direction, turn to the right direction instantly, with a beautiful U-turn!"
"There is so much hope in a little flower and so many flowers in a little hope!"
"For those who wander in the depths, there is nothing deep!"
"It is not the jumps you made in your life but mostly the jumps you haven't made are the real source of regrets in your life!"
"Nobody is exempt from the surprises of life!"
Explore more quotes by George Carlin
"He - and if there is a God, I am convinced he is a he, because no woman could or would ever fuck things up this badly."
"I think people should be allowed to do anything they want. We haven't tried that for a while. Maybe this time it'll work."
"Most people work just hard enough not to get fired and get paid just enough money not to quit."
"I do this real moron thing, and it's called thinking. And apparently I'm not a very good American because I like to form my own opinions."
"I'm not a person who thinks they can have it all, but I certainly feel that with a bit of effort and guile I should be able to have more than my fair share."
"I like it when a flower or a little tuft of grass grows through a crack in the concrete. It's so fuckin' heroic."
"I went through the usual stages: imp, rascal, scalawag, whippersnapper. And, of course, after that it's just a small step to full-blown sociopath."
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