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"When I was born I was so ugly the doctor slapped my mother."
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Exlpore more Mother quotes
"A mother is the most important blessing of your life."
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Personal Development
"When I saw Virginia Woolf, somewhere between the first and second acts, someone I had known as my mother became somebody else."
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Personal Development
"My mother and father were fantastic, very active. I find it difficult to say this, but I'm quite a loving person and I've always been loving to my friends. In the long run, that pays off. I'm very interested in other people, and if you are, they're interested in you."
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Personal Development
"The babe at first feeds upon the mother's bosom, but it is always on her heart."
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Personal Development
"But my mother loved The Elephant Man, and my father gave David Lynch a scholarship to study in Rome."
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Personal Development
"A mother's love is more beautiful than any fresh flower."
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Personal Development
"My daughter teases me once in a while saying, Remember when you used to be my mother and you had black hair?"
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Personal Development
"I wanted to become a kindergarten teacher like my mother."
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Personal Development
"Now I have children of my own. They ask their mother what will I be. Will I be handsome, will I be rich?"
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"I had this whole ritual with my mother making the bed with me inside it so I would be invisible."
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Explore more quotes by Rodney Dangerfield
"My psychiatrist told me I was crazy and I said I want a second opinion. He said okay, you're ugly too."
Opinion
"I have good looking kids. Thank goodness my wife cheats on me."
Wife
"Acting deals with very delicate emotions. It is not putting up a mask. Each time an actor acts he does not hide; he exposes himself."
Time
"My wife was afraid of the dark... then she saw me naked and now she's afraid of the light."
Wife
"When I was a kid my parents moved a lot, but I always found them."
Parents
"I had plenty of pimples as a kid. One day I fell asleep in the library. When I woke up, a blind man was reading my face."
Blind
"I was so ugly my mother used to feed me with a sling shot."
Mother
"My marriage is on the rocks again, yeah, my wife just broke up with her boyfriend."
Marriage
"My wife's jealousy is getting ridiculous. The other day she looked at my calendar and wanted to know who May was."
Wife
"I could tell my parents hated me. My bath toys were a toaster and a radio."
Parents
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