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"I resisted the urge to hurl my plate at him. 'Of course not, Ian. It's just that normally at this hour, Bones and I are fucking like rabbits, so I get twitchy when I have to wait for him to climb aboard."
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"When in doubt, poke the beehive with a stick to see if anything interesting flies out.I clapped my hands. 'I had no idea Pit teams had such pretty cheerleaders. Can you do it again, but with more spirit this time?"
"The youth of Idaho falls should be encouraged to take drugs in order to cope up with the fact that there is plutonium in their drinking water."
"Rumours are like sexually transmitted diseases, both are spread by whores."
"He was going to take a dive into this lake. He just didn't know it. Cerise rose, finding footing in the soft mud. The water came up to just below her breasts and her wet shirt stuck to her body. William's gaze snagged on her chest. Yep, keep looking, Lord Bill. Keeeeeep looking."
"I'm not a parent myself, but I think the best solution at this point is to slap that child across the face. It won't stop crying, but at least now it'll be doing it for a good reason."
"I resisted the urge to hurl my plate at him. 'Of course not, Ian. It's just that normally at this hour, Bones and I are fucking like rabbits, so I get twitchy when I have to wait for him to climb aboard."
"In fact, in recent years I have become more and more didactic about pubic hair - to the point where I now believe that there are only four things a grown, modern woman should have: a pair of yellow shoes (they unexpectedly go with everything), a friend who will come and post bail at 4 a.m., a fail-safe pie recipe, and a proper muff. A big, hairy minge. A lovely furry moof that looks - when she sits, naked - as if she has a marmoset sitting in her lap. A tame marmoset, that she can send of to pickpocket things, should she so need it - like that trained monkey in Raiders of the Lost Ark."
"And I was all, 'Don't be gross, you crustacious fuck. You pull that thing out and I'll pepper-spray you until you fry.' (You have to be stern with weenie waggers--I've been exposed to on the bus over seventeen times, so I know.)"
"And maybe it was fair; if a book was any good, it was a slap in the face to someone."
"Why don't I just give you a pair of my panties to hang around your neck? Then whenever you feel jealous, you can wave them at whoever's pissing you off."
Explore more quotes by Jeaniene Frost
"Charlie whistled 'Amazing Grace' as he drove. It was all I could do not to whip my head around and snap, Are you kidding me? Couldn't he pick something more appropriate, like 'Shout at the Devil' or 'Don't fear the Reaper'? Some people had no sense of the proper music for a kidnapping."
"He also deeply distrusts vampires, as you had guessed yourself, Bones added. 'Aside from that, all I heard was enough repetitions of 'how many chucks could a woodchuck chuck' to make me want to stake myself."
"Juan gave Bones the most admiring look he'd bestowed on him yet. 'You talked her into going without panties all these years? Madre de Dios, now that's impressive. I could learn a great deal from you, amigo."
"She seemed to be a nice person, too, instead of a homicidal bitch like his former wife. Otherwise, the world should fear. When Mencheres fell for a woman, he fell hard. If Kira asked for her own continent as a birthday present, Mencheres would probably have one conquered for her before she blew out her candles."
"Bones didn't share any of my qualms about suddenly holding an arm that wasn't attached to a body anymore. He just grabbed the ghoul by his other arm and began thumping him over the head with the loose limb. I'd heard Bones threaten to beat someone with their own limb before, but I'd always assumed that was a figure of speech. Apparently not."
"If you were Catholic, you'd singe the ears of the priest you confessed to."
"I doubt you've ever been forced to nonstop bang a woman hyped up on the undead voodoo version of Spanish fly, have you?His chuckle was soft. 'Can't say that I have, Kitten.'Yeah, well, consider me an original.This time, when his lips brushed across my skin, it lasted more than a moment.'I always have."
"I don't mind foreigners. God save the queen!' he squeaked and ran."
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