"In New York, we had primary elections for mayor. To improve their chances, all five candidates changed their name to Rudy Giuliani."

Elections, Name

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"In New York, we had primary elections for mayor. To improve their chances, all five candidates changed their name to Rudy Giuliani."

Exlpore more Elections quotes

"The candidate out front on Labor Day has historically been the one who stayed ahead in November."

Peter Jennings, Canadian Journalist

Elections, Day, Labor

"The labour Party has lost the last four elections. If they lose another, they get to keep the liberal party."

Clive Anderson, English Entertainer

Elections, Liberal, Party

"I learned more about elections on election night 2000 than I ever did during my 16 years of schooling."

Rob Corddry, American Comedian

Elections, Night, Years

"I am constitutionally competent to contest the elections."

Benazir Bhutto, Pakistani Leader

Elections,

"I know that elections must be limited only to those who understand that the Arabs are the deadly enemy of the Jewish state, who would bring on us a slow Auschwitz - not with gas, but with knives and hatchets."

Meir Kahane, American Clergyman

Elections, Enemy, State

"I am planning to return and contest the October elections in Pakistan."

Benazir Bhutto, Pakistani Leader

Elections, October, Planning

"The Iraqi elections were an important first step."

Brent Scowcroft, American Public Servant

Elections, First

"Do not seek to find a reason why elections are not possible. Seek to make them possible, and they will be possible."

Ahmed Chalabi, Iraqi Statesman

Elections, Reason, Will

"I think the Democratic Party realizes, having lost two presidential elections, we need to do a better job of creating a farm team."

John Mahoney, English Actor

Elections, Job, Party

"Do you ever get the feeling that the only reason we have elections is to find out if the polls were right?"

Robert Orben, American Entertainer

Elections, Feeling, Reason, Right

Explore more quotes by Conan O'Brien

"Officials at the White House are saying that President Bush hasn't changed his schedule much since the war started. The main difference, they say, is that he's started watching the news and taping Sponge Bob."

War

"Nobody in life gets exactly what they thought they were going to get, but if you work really hard and you're kind, amazing things will happen."

Life

"Yesterday, the Pentagon warned U.S. reporters that they should get out of Baghdad as soon as possible because the U.S. could attack at any time. Then the Pentagon added, 'Whatever you do, don't tell Geraldo.'"

Time

"President Bush left for Canada today to attend a trade summit. Reportedly, the trade summit got off to an awkward start when the president pulled out his baseball cards."

Baseball

"A study in the Washington Post says that women have better verbal skills than men. I just want to say to the authors of that study: 'Duh.'"

Woman

"Earlier today, Arnold Schwarzenegger criticized the California school system, calling it disastrous. Arnold says California's schools are so bad that its graduates are willing to vote for me."

School

"Fish recognize a bad leader."

Leader

"In West Virginia yesterday, a man was arrested for stealing several blow-up dolls. Reportedly, police didn't have any trouble catching the man because he was completely out of breath."

Man

"President Clinton signed a $10 million deal to write a book by 2003. Isn't that amazing? Yes, and get this, not only that, President Bush signed a $10 million deal to read a book by 2003."

President

"John Travolta said he sometimes lets his friends take control of his airplane even though they don't know what they're doing. Then Travolta said he often does the same thing with his career."

Control