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Jon Stewart

"More than 150 heads of state attended the UN Summit, giving New Yorkers a chance to get in touch with prejudices they didn't even know they had."

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"More than 150 heads of state attended the UN Summit, giving New Yorkers a chance to get in touch with prejudices they didn't even know they had."

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Asa Don Brown

"We should read to give our souls a chance to luxuriate."

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Asa Don Brown

"We are able to find everything in our memory, which is like a dispensary or chemical laboratory in which chance steers our hand sometimes to a soothing drug and sometimes to a dangerous poison."

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Asa Don Brown

"He is not to pass for a man of reason who stumbles upon reason by chance but he who knows it and can judge it and has a true taste for it."

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Asa Don Brown

"No fact in human nature is more characteristic than its willingness to live on a chance. The existence of the chance makes the difference between a life of which the keynote is resignation and a life of which the keynote is hope."

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Asa Don Brown

"One way to express the answer is that it might happen by 'chance'. But 'chance' is just a word expressing ignorance. It means 'determined by some as yet unknown, or unspecified, means'."

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Asa Don Brown

"What is the likelihood, of winning the lottery, then lose it all the next day when you step out your front door and get struck by lightning? Probably, very slim, but then anything is possible."

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Asa Don Brown

"If I could, I'd write a huge encyclopedia just about the words luck and coincidence."

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Asa Don Brown

"Newspaper readership is declining like crazy. In fact, there's a good chance that nobody is reading my column."

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Asa Don Brown

"As far as now, as far as I think everyone deserv a chance. No matter who is he and who was he."

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Asa Don Brown

"While there is a chance of the world getting through its troubles, I hold that a reasonable man has to behave as though he were sure of it. If at the end your cheerfulness in not justified, at any rate you will have been cheerful."

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Jon Stewart
"The seven marvels that best represent man's achievements over the last 2,000 years will be determined by Internet vote... so look for Howard Stern's Private Parts to come in No. 1."
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"There is no such thing as an impartial jury because there are no impartial people. There are people that argue on the web for hours about who their favorite character on "Friends" is."
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"I've always liked Atlanta. And not just for the strip clubs, but the shopping and the food."
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Jon Stewart
"You just have to keep trying to do good work, and hope that it leads to more good work. I want to look back on my career and be proud of the work, and be proud that I tried everything. Yes, I want to look back and know that I was terrible at a variety of things."
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Jon Stewart
"I can be in 20 movies. But I'll never be an actor."
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Jon Stewart
"Yesterday, the president met with a group he calls the coalition of the willing. Or, as the rest of the world calls them, Britain and Spain."
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Jon Stewart
"If you watch the news and don't like it, then this is your counter program to the news."
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Jon Stewart
"Ahh, Earth Day, the only day of the year where being able to hacky-sack will get you laid."
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Jon Stewart
"I celebrated Thanksgiving in an old-fashioned way. I invited everyone in my neighborhood to my house, we had an enormous feast, and then I killed them and took their land."
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Jon Stewart
"I've been to Canada, and I've always gotten the impression that I could take the country over in about two days."
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