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"I was raised around heterosexuals, as all heterosexuals are, that's where us gay people come from... you heterosexuals."
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"My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was sixty. She's ninety-seven now, and we don't know where the hell she is."
"Stuffed deer heads on walls are bad enough, but it's worse when you see them wearing dark glasses, having streamers around their necks and a hat on their antlers. Because then you know they were enjoying themselves at a party when they were shot."
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"I'm a comedian, and I definitely see the humor in a lot of things. I am also sad a lot. I cry often and easily. I think you're supposed to feel all kinds of things."
"I would love to have the same rights as everybody else. I would love, I don't care if it's called marriage. I don't care if it's called, you know, domestic partnership. I don't care what it's called."
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