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"My cooking is so bad my kids thought Thanksgiving was to commemorate Pearl Harbor."
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"Words without thoughts never to heaven go."
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Personal Development
"We seldom find people ungrateful so long as it is thought we can serve them."
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Personal Development
"Thought and theory must precede all salutary action; yet action is nobler in itself than either thought or theory."
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Personal Development
"I've been drunk for about a week now, and I thought it might sober me up to sit in a library."
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Personal Development
"Too much thought can find fault in anything, even if there is no fault to be found."
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Personal Development
"Even if things were the same, people's perception of them might have been very different back then. The darkness of night was probably deeper then, so the moon must have been that much bigger and brighter."
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Personal Development
"A subtle thought that is in error may yet give rise to fruitful inquiry that can establish truths of great value."
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Personal Development
"The beginning of thought is in disagreement - not only with others but also with ourselves."
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Personal Development
"It is especially important to encourage unorthodox thinking when the situation is critical: At such moments every new word and fresh thought is more precious than gold. Indeed, people must not be deprived of the right to think their own thoughts."
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Personal Development
"I thought about how we need to make children feel that there are times in their lives when they need to be alone and quiet and to be able to accept their aloneness."
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"My cooking is so bad my kids thought Thanksgiving was to commemorate Pearl Harbor."
Thought
"You know you're old if they have discontinued your blood type."
Blood
"I'm eighteen years behind in my ironing."
Years
"There's a new medical crisis. Doctors are reporting that many men are having allergic reactions to latex condoms. They say they cause severe swelling. So what's the problem?"
Medical
"The reason the pro tells you to keep your head down is so you can't see him laughing."
Reason
"My mother-in-law had a pain beneath her left breast. Turned out to be a trick knee."
Mother
"If it weren't for baseball, many kids wouldn't know what a millionaire looked like."
Baseball
"I've been asked to say a couple of words about my husband, Fang. How about short and cheap?"
Husband
"There's so little money in my bank account, my scenic checks show a ghetto."
Money
"Best way to get rid of kitchen odors: Eat out."
Kitchen
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