"I dare you to call Ask-A-Nurse and tell them you feel a presence in your womb region."

Humor, Life, Health, Truth

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"I dare you to call Ask-A-Nurse and tell them you feel a presence in your womb region."

Exlpore more Humor quotes

"Fool me once, shame on youfool me twice, shame on mefool me thrice, I'm gonna get the frying pan!"

Anthony Liccione, American Author

Humor, Trust, Mistake, Learning

"As a comedian, the more you commit the sin of stupidity, three essential things happen to your life:~people applaud you incessantly.~love you more than their parents.~give you a daily bread."

Michael Bassey Johnson, Nigerian Philosopher

Humor, Comedy, Stupidity, Life, Love

"One who has both feet firmly planted in the air."

Anonymous, Unknown Unknown

Humor, Confusion, Logic, Irony

"My religion consists of laughing at myself. My motto is this: As long as there is a me, there is a reason to laugh out loud!"

C. JoyBell C., American Author

Humor, Self, Life, Joy

"Well, that depends, I suppose. I heard someone once say that men dance the same way they have sex. So, if you want everyone here to think you're the kind of guy who just sits around and-" He stood up. "Let's dance."

Richelle Mead, American Author

Humor, Dance, Sex, Judgment

"The cleverest woman finds a need for foolish admirers."

Anonymous, Unknown Unknown

Humor, Women, Needs, Attention

"Always be wary of any helpful item that weighs less than its operating manual."

Terry Pratchett, English Author

Humor, Weight, Warning, Technology

"She breathed an enormous sigh, looked at Poirot, Looked away, and suddenly blurted out, "You're too old. Nobody told me you were so old. I really don't want to be rude but - there it is. You're too old. I'm really sorry." She turned abruptly and blundered out of the room, rather like a desperate moth in lamplight. Poirot, his mouth open, heard the bang of the front door. He ejaculated: "Non d'un nom d'un nom..."

Agatha Christie, English Writer

Humor, Aging, Appearance, Truth

"I was my own boss, but that all changed the day I got married."

Matshona Dhliwayo, Zimbabwean Philosopher

Humor, Marriage, Change, Responsibility, Life

"Could you hold the chainsaw a bit closer to your mouth, please?"

Chuck Palahniuk, American Novelist

Humor, Death, Danger, Irony

Explore more quotes by Rainbow Rowell

"They were almost never alone, and now that they almost-practically were, he felt kind of frantic for her attention."

Affection

"I can't believe there's a part of you that grows when you need it. You're like a mutant.""I'm a vampire," Baz says, "and can you hear yourself?"

Fantasy

"Because I'm the kind of girl who fantasizes about being trapped in a library overnight."

Fantasy

"She thought of ... the way he never made made her feel crazy, even when she was acting crazy, and never made her feel like a failure, even when she was failing."

Compassion

"Maybe I'm some sort of perverted cartoon-sexual."

Humor

"I don't like hello. It makes me sound like I have dementia, like I've never heard a phone ring before and I don't know what's supposed to happen next. Hello?"

Communication

"Looks like somebody's got jungle fever.''That's not even the right kind of racist."

Social

"What do you want from me, Snow?""Nothing," he says. And he means it, the actual bastard."

Conflict

"You think I'm cute?" He said thinkly, pulling on her hand.She was glad he couldn't see her face. "I think you're..."Beautiful. Breathtaking. Like the person in a Greek myth who makes one of the gods stop caring about being a god."

Love

"I always knew he was selfish and self-indulgent and kind of lazy, those are practically prerequisites for playing lead guitar."

Personality