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Lana Turner

"Humor has been the balm of my life, but it's been reserved for those close to me, not part of the public Lana."

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"Humor has been the balm of my life, but it's been reserved for those close to me, not part of the public Lana."

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Amber Hurdle

"Your party kicked so much ass!Even though you suck so much! It's like, instead of blood, your heart pumps liquid suck! But thanks for the beer!"

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Amber Hurdle

"The real satire starts when I'm shockingly mocked,not mockingly shocked."

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Amber Hurdle

"He has got no good red blood in his body," said Sir James."No. Somebody put a drop under a magnifying glass, and it was all semicolons and parentheses," said Mrs. Cadwallader."

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Amber Hurdle

"CHARTERIS [unfolding his arms in terror] No, please. Dont. As a philosopher, it's my business to tell other people the truth; but it's not their business to tell it to me. I dont like it: it hurts."

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Amber Hurdle

"How was I supposed to know 'lucked out' means 'I got screwed over' in Australian?"

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Amber Hurdle

"I believe the phrase you're looking for is 'too much money and not enough things to spend it on."

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Amber Hurdle

"Where did you find that one?''I have no idea. I'm a magnet for crazies, I guess.''They must be able to sense a kindred spirit.''Your one to talk. Don't you have more hordes of the undead to lead in a glorious revolution?''Zombies not undead. There's a fine distinction. And no. Right now I'm scouting new talent. The glorious revolution comes tomorrow."

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Amber Hurdle

"I realized women and humor were linked very closely."

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Amber Hurdle

"A good joke doesn't necessarily need appreciation from others. One can freely laugh at one's own deserving jokes."

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Amber Hurdle

"He who joyfully marches to music in rank and file has already earned my contempt. He has been given a large brain by mistake, since for him the spinal cord would suffice."

Explore more quotes by Lana Turner

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Lana Turner
"I've always loved a challenge."
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Lana Turner
"I'm so gullible. I'm so damn gullible. And I am so sick of me being gullible."
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Lana Turner
"A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man."
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Lana Turner
"My life has been a series of emergencies."
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Lana Turner
"The truth is, sex doesn't mean that much to me now."
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Lana Turner
"A gentleman is simply a patient wolf."
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Lana Turner
"It's said in Hollywood that you should always forgive your enemies - because you never know when you'll have to work with them."
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Lana Turner
"Humor has been the balm of my life, but it's been reserved for those close to me, not part of the public Lana."
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