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"Feeling good about government is like looking on the bright side of any catastrophe. When you quit looking on the bright side, the catastrophe is still there."
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"Patriotism is the narcissism of countries."
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Personal Development
"Extreme positions are not succeeded by moderate ones, but by contrary extreme positions."
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Personal Development
"Some people had attack dogs. Ghastek had attack lawyers."
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Personal Development
"All authority belongs to the people."
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Personal Development
"A reactionary is a somnambulist walking backwards."
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Personal Development
"I seldom think of politics more than eighteen hours a day."
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Personal Development
"An empty stomach is not a good political adviser."
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Personal Development
"It is easy for those who conflate religion with government to interpret any criticism of government or policy as an 'attack' on their 'faith'."
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Personal Development
"Speech is an arrangement of notes that will never be played again."
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Personal Development
"There is this common notion that young conservatives are the few, that most people had liberal worldviews when they were young. If this is true, then it is with great irony that a number of old liberals must never had progressed into conservatives as they grew older."
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"America wasn't founded so that we could all be better. America was founded so we could all be anything we damned well pleased."
America
"Children must be considered in a divorce considered valuable pawns in the nasty legal and financial contest that is about to ensue."
Legal
"Staying married may have long-term benefits. You can elicit much more sympathy from friends over a bad marriage than you ever can from a good divorce."
Marriage
"The Democrats are the party that says government will make you smarter, taller, richer, and remove the crabgrass on your lawn. The Republicans are the party that says government doesn't work and then they get elected and prove it."
Government
"In our brief national history we have shot four of our presidents, worried five of them to death, impeached one and hounded another out of office. And when all else fails, we hold an election and assassinate their character."
History
"A hat should be taken off when you greet a lady and left off for the rest of your life. Nothing looks more stupid than a hat."
Life
"Making fun of born-again Christians is like hunting dairy cows with a high powered rifle and scope."
Cows
"There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women. Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL convertible."
Woman
"There is only one basic human right, the right to do as you damn well please. And with it comes the only basic human duty, the duty to take the consequences."
Consequence
"If you are young and you drink a great deal it will spoil your health, slow your mind, make you fat - in other words, turn you into an adult."
Health
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