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"We cannot measure time. We can only measure changes of life and the universe."
Author Name
Personal Development
"I wouldn't ask too much of her,' I ventured. 'You can't change the past.''Can't change the past?' he cried incredulously. 'Why of course you can!"
Author Name
Personal Development
"Life is a bubble in the ocean of time. At the same time, it can hold all the water of the ocean in her heart."
Author Name
Personal Development
"A broad margin of leisure is as beautiful in a man's life as in a book. Haste makes waste, no less in life than in housekeeping. Keep the time, observe the hours of the universe, not of the cars."
Author Name
Personal Development
"God had infinite time to give us.... He cut it up into a near succession of new mornings and with each therefore a new idea new inventions and new applications."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Time is the greatest and longest-established spinner of all. ... His factory is a secret place his work noiseless and his hands are mutes."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Eternity is a mere moment, just long enough for a joke."
Author Name
Personal Development
"The value of time is immeasurable."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Sometimes I feel like if you just watch things, just sit still and let the world exist in front of you - sometimes I swear that just for a second time freezes and the world pauses in its tilt. Just for a second. And if you somehow found a way to live in that second, then you would live forever."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Worrying about what happened on Monday, or, what might happen on Wednesday, is at the expense of one's Tuesday."
Author Name
Personal Development
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"Anybody could say anything they want about me, and it literally never penetrates my skin."
Skin
"You know, my first album, some of those jokes I'd done for twelve years because I couldn't throw 'em out."
First
"The hardest that I've laughed at a movie was probably Team America. I laughed 'til I thought I was just gonna throw up. I almost had to turn it off."
Thought
"I believe that if life gives you lemons, you should make lemonade... And try to find somebody whose life has given them vodka, and have a party."
Life
"There have been times in my life that I've had a ton of vices, and my demons have run amok for years and years and years."
Life
"I didn't get where I am today by worryin' about how I'd feel tomorrow."
Today
"The next time you have a thought... let it go."
Time
"You wanna get the truth out of me, get me hammered."
Truth
"There were years when I was a beer and tequila guy, then I got real fat. And then I found that you could actually go on a diet and drink scotch. Then I got hooked on scotch, and if you get hooked on scotch, then everything else just tastes wrong."
Diet
"My goal is just to become a better comedian."
Goal
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