"When I die of heart failure the next time you frighten me like that, you can put that on my gravestone-'I didn't mean to startle her."

Humor, Surprise, Exaggeration, Affection

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"When I die of heart failure the next time you frighten me like that, you can put that on my gravestone-'I didn't mean to startle her."

Exlpore more Humor quotes

"He smiles, and he's made of trouble. We should have dropped him in the Thames in a bag of stones. We should have left him out for the fairies."

Rainbow Rowell, American Author

Humor, Danger, Trouble, Judgment

"Rogerson," I asked him sweetly as we sat watching a video in the pool house, "where would I find the pelagic zone?""In the open sea," he said. "Now shut up and eat your Junior Mints."

Sarah Dessen, American Author

Humor, Knowledge, Curiosity, Learning

"Playing Solitaire is a non-smoking employee's smoke break."

Mokokoma Mokhonoana, South African Philosopher

Humor, Truth, Wisdom, Life, Regret

"The fun we'll have tonight is called figging."

Cherise Sinclair, American Author

Humor, Anticipation, Adventure, Secrecy

"Wit is the only wall between us and the dark."

Mark Van Doren, American Poet

Humor, Wit

"If this is coffee, please bring me some tea; but if this is tea, please bring me some coffee."

Abraham Lincoln, American Politician

Humor, Coffee, Tea, President

"I liked the humor of it, I've always enjoyed a sense of humor in God and in religion and in spirituality."

Amber Tamblyn, American Actress

Humor, Religion, God, Sense

"I just meant maybe you could set here and drink one of em with me.He squinted at her. You ever notice how women have trouble takin no for a answer? I think itstarts about age three.What about men?They get used to it. They better."

Cormac McCarthy, American Writer

Humor, Women, Men, Aging, Experience

"A sense of humor keen enough to show a man his own absurdities will keep him from the commission of all sins, or nearly all, save those worth committing."

Samuel Butler, British Poet

Humor, Man, Sense, Will

"Christ and The Church: If he were to apply for a divorce on the grounds of cruelty, adultery and desertion, he would probably get one."

Samuel Butler, British Poet

Humor, Adultery, Christ, Cruelty, Divorce

Explore more quotes by Patricia Briggs

"New rules. If you are smart enough to live, you won't hit Charles's mate in front of his father."

Wisdom

"Stupid young girls who get caught alone in the forest fall prey to anything that crosses their paths, be the beast animal, human or shapeshifter."

Life

"It is one of those lessons that every child should learn: Don't play with fire, sharp objects, or ancient artifacts."

Caution

"Yes," he said sincerely. "Such a one deserves peanut butter on the seat of his pants."

Justice

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Exlpore more Humor quotes

"He smiles, and he's made of trouble. We should have dropped him in the Thames in a bag of stones. We should have left him out for the fairies."

"Rogerson," I asked him sweetly as we sat watching a video in the pool house, "where would I find the pelagic zone?""In the open sea," he said. "Now shut up and eat your Junior Mints."

"Playing Solitaire is a non-smoking employee's smoke break."

"The fun we'll have tonight is called figging."

"Wit is the only wall between us and the dark."

"If this is coffee, please bring me some tea; but if this is tea, please bring me some coffee."

"I liked the humor of it, I've always enjoyed a sense of humor in God and in religion and in spirituality."

"I just meant maybe you could set here and drink one of em with me.He squinted at her. You ever notice how women have trouble takin no for a answer? I think itstarts about age three.What about men?They get used to it. They better."

"A sense of humor keen enough to show a man his own absurdities will keep him from the commission of all sins, or nearly all, save those worth committing."

"Christ and The Church: If he were to apply for a divorce on the grounds of cruelty, adultery and desertion, he would probably get one."

Explore more quotes by Patricia Briggs

"New rules. If you are smart enough to live, you won't hit Charles's mate in front of his father."

"You play games with people's lives.(...) You forget that they are fragile."

"A man learns with age, if he is lucky."

"Where does a werewolf sleep? Anywhere he wants to."

"Don't make light of any man's pain."

"Civilization is vastly overrated."

"You have to acknowledge evil, or you give it too much power over you."

"Stupid young girls who get caught alone in the forest fall prey to anything that crosses their paths, be the beast animal, human or shapeshifter."

"It is one of those lessons that every child should learn: Don't play with fire, sharp objects, or ancient artifacts."

"Yes," he said sincerely. "Such a one deserves peanut butter on the seat of his pants."