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"I tried to blow a yellow jacket out and now it's wearing a bow tie in its mouth."
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"Fool me once, shame on youfool me twice, shame on mefool me thrice, I'm gonna get the frying pan!"
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Personal Development
"As a comedian, the more you commit the sin of stupidity, three essential things happen to your life:~people applaud you incessantly.~love you more than their parents.~give you a daily bread."
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Personal Development
"One who has both feet firmly planted in the air."
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Personal Development
"My religion consists of laughing at myself. My motto is this: As long as there is a me, there is a reason to laugh out loud!"
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Personal Development
"Well, that depends, I suppose. I heard someone once say that men dance the same way they have sex. So, if you want everyone here to think you're the kind of guy who just sits around and-" He stood up. "Let's dance."
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Personal Development
"The cleverest woman finds a need for foolish admirers."
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Personal Development
"Always be wary of any helpful item that weighs less than its operating manual."
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Personal Development
"She breathed an enormous sigh, looked at Poirot, Looked away, and suddenly blurted out, "You're too old. Nobody told me you were so old. I really don't want to be rude but - there it is. You're too old. I'm really sorry." She turned abruptly and blundered out of the room, rather like a desperate moth in lamplight. Poirot, his mouth open, heard the bang of the front door. He ejaculated: "Non d'un nom d'un nom..."
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Personal Development
"I was my own boss, but that all changed the day I got married."
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Personal Development
"Could you hold the chainsaw a bit closer to your mouth, please?"
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"True love is like little roses, sweet, fragrant in small doses."
Love
"Lay a golden egg.After you built a nest,You wait for a leg.And you land next. Now you hope and pray.Expect for the best. Go on with no delay. Get it right at last."
Life
"You cannot be who you are not. Simply rest, sit still and unknot. You may even try to emulate and inspire,But it's the inner self that you'll transpire."
Mindfulness
"Like the moon shining bright Up high with all its grace,I can only show you at night And hide half of my face."
Nature
"A balanced dieT to make you die with a tea, consists of holding two bags of cookies on each hand and a voracious hunger to consume."
Humor
"Love frees us of all pain, or of any restraint. Once a circle that ever widens without end. Various colors it shines in our lives to paintExcelsis, glorious manifestation to befriend."
Love
"There are no good tights, It s all such a rare sight... Gently, I put one in. Holes are within! They re only good for a fight."
Humor
"Happiness lies even in tiny little butterflies. You just have to open up your eyes and see where beauty flies to beautify your world lenghtwise."
Happiness
"Love knows no barriers, no distance.It makes you dance as if in a trance,And catches you up when you are down.It makes you draw a smile from a frown,And embarks you in a river when you fall, And most of its grace, it embraces us all!"
Love
"If you do not want to be forgotten as soon as you are dead...be read, or try coming back and pull the feet of those who are still alive instead!"
Life
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