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"Fool me once, shame on youfool me twice, shame on mefool me thrice, I'm gonna get the frying pan!"
Author Name
Personal Development
"As a comedian, the more you commit the sin of stupidity, three essential things happen to your life:~people applaud you incessantly.~love you more than their parents.~give you a daily bread."
Author Name
Personal Development
"One who has both feet firmly planted in the air."
Author Name
Personal Development
"My religion consists of laughing at myself. My motto is this: As long as there is a me, there is a reason to laugh out loud!"
Author Name
Personal Development
"Well, that depends, I suppose. I heard someone once say that men dance the same way they have sex. So, if you want everyone here to think you're the kind of guy who just sits around and-" He stood up. "Let's dance."
Author Name
Personal Development
"The cleverest woman finds a need for foolish admirers."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Always be wary of any helpful item that weighs less than its operating manual."
Author Name
Personal Development
"I was my own boss, but that all changed the day I got married."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Could you hold the chainsaw a bit closer to your mouth, please?"
Author Name
Personal Development
"I went to the kitchen and felt-up the turkey."
Author Name
Personal Development
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"Curses on the law! Most of my fellow citizens are the sorry consequences of uncommitted abortions."
Consequence
"The sound principle of a topsy-turvy lifestyle in the framework of an upside-down world order has stood every test."
Society
"Scandal begins when the police put a stop to it."
Society
"He who does without the praise of the crowd will not deny himself an opportunity to be his own adherent."
Opportunity
"Squeeze human nature into the straitjacket of criminal justice and crime will appear."
Nature
"It is the style of idealism to console itself for the loss of something old with the ability to gape at something new."
Ability
"Feminine passion is to masculine as an epic is to an epigram."
Passion
"I and my public understand each other very well: it does not hear what I say, and I don't say what it wants to hear."
Public
"Experiences are savings which a miser puts aside. Wisdom is an inheritance which a wastrel cannot exhaust."
Wisdom
"Matrimony is the union of meanness and martyrdom."
Marriage
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