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"You know it's funny that none of the regular late-night shows now use guest hosts the way Johnny did. No one talks about it much, but it's curious that they don't do it. They would each have to be asked the reason why they don't."
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"It's a funny thing about life; if you refuse to accept anything but the best, you very often get it."
Author Name
Personal Development
"I'm doing 5000 seat theaters and audiences are going nuts, it's fantastic and it makes me very happy. I'm dirty, but not like this; I just do comedy that I find funny. I'm working on a new tv show for cable and it's not set up yet."
Author Name
Personal Development
"It's funny; I actually made poorer decisions when I sobered up then when I was screwed up."
Author Name
Personal Development
"It was a JOB; the video show was a JOB; you don't tell the Aristocrats joke at 8 o'clock at night on network tv, it would be funny though. But those guys know I like dirty stuff, I like clean stuff too."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Of course, the wind sort of swept up and the music was flying around in mid air and they were trying to play off it. You had to be there. It was quite funny."
Author Name
Personal Development
"It's funny how the music industry is enraged about the Internet and the way things are copied without being paid for. But you know why people steal the music? Because they can't afford the music."
Author Name
Personal Development
"I am odd-looking. I sometimes think I look like a funny Muppet."
Author Name
Personal Development
"I never thought I was funny, but I enjoy being funny."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Only man has dignity; only man, therefore, can be funny."
Author Name
Personal Development
"My friend had a funny remark; he told me everybody has something - some people have a big butt, some people are insecure and at least you know what it is, even if it's a lump on your head. I know I have a lump on my head."
Author Name
Personal Development
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"I'm not a party guy. I don't carouse very much."
Party
"First of all, I'm not the kind of guy that likes to rehash the show and so forth and so on."
First
"But I really like hosting, I think it's a strength of mine. It allows me to improvise, and I love the spontaneity of that, and I think I'm funny behind the desk when interviewing someone."
Funny
"Carol Burnett was particularly funny. She swore for the first time on television on Larry Sanders."
Time
"Without comedy as a defense mechanism I wouldn't be able to survive."
Comedy
"I am pretty tenacious as a perfectionist in terms of getting something right."
Pretty
"I don't know how to ground myself without the other actor present."
Actor
"I guess he wanted to see a little more sexual activity because in real life, in bed I think less is more and let the woman come to me. Frankly, I don't even need a woman there."
Life
"I practice safe sex - I use an airbag."
Sex
"Which is, I'm an optimist that two people can be together to work out their conflicts. And that commitment, I think, might be what love is, because they both grow from their relationship."
Love
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