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Exlpore more Humor quotes

"Playing Solitaire is a non-smoking employee's smoke break."

"I've accepted the fact I have mental illness but when my imaginary friends start calling me crazy that's where I draw the line."

"I laugh for sheer medicinal purposes, because I feel I might die otherwise."

"Extolling the virtues of conservation of energy, Churchill advised, "Never stand when you can sit, and never sit when you can lie down."

"Hey, guard! Ian hollered out loud. "Do you think we could get a bathroom break? The guard seemed to snicker as he pointed to the grass outside the cell. Eena smirked at how dead-on her thoughts had been after all. "Come on, Ian complained. "She can't do that, she's a girl. The soldier smiled wryly, a shrug communicating his indifference. Eena laughed in her mind. (I don't know what you think's so funny. You're the one who's gotta pee.) Oddly enough, that fact just made her laugh even more."

"Did you talk to him about it?""Oh, sure. Nothing happened, yadda yadda. The usual. But my maydar went off like crazy.""Maydar?""As in, he may be thinking about super hot sex with her. Like radar, only not as sure."
Explore more quotes by Richelle Mead

"Sometimes you wake up from a dream. Sometimes you wake up in a dream. And sometimes, every once in a while, you wake up in someone else's dream."

"Do you know what I see in you now? The usual aura. A steady golden yellow, healthy and strong, with spikes of purple here and there. But when I do this. . . .He rested a hand on my hip, and my whole body tensed up. That hand moved around my hip, slipping under my shirt to rest on the small of my back. My skin burned where he touched me, and the places that were untouched longed for that heat.. The colors deepen, it burns more intensely, the purple increases. Why? Why, Sydney? He used that hand on me to pull me closer. "Why do you react that way if I don't mean anything to you? There was a desperation in his voice, and it was legitimate."

"What's your name?""What?" I asked, squinting at the light."Your name." I recognized Dr. Olendzki peering over me."You know my name.""I want you to tell me.""Rose. Rose Hathaway.""Do you know your birthday?""Of course I do. Why are you asking me such stupid things? Did you lose my records?"Dr. Olendzki gave an exasperated sigh and walked off."

"You know, Aunt Tasha makes jokes about how youE1d actually be a better queen than the others, except sometimes . . . I donE1t think sheE1s joking."

"Sydney, don't leave Adrian because of me.""It's more complicated than that," I said automatically."It's really not," she said. "From everything I've seen and heard, you're just afraid. You've always controlled every detail of your life. When you couldn't-like with the Alchemists-you found a way to seize back that control.""There is nothing wrong with wanting control," I snapped."Except that we can't always have it, and sometimes that is a good thing. A great thing, even," she added. "And that's how it is with Adrian. No matter how hard you try, you aren't going to be able to control your feelings for him. You can't help loving him, and so you're running away. I'm just an excuse."

"You don't know your father, do you?I shook my head. "No. All I know is he must have had wicked cool hair.Dimitri glanced up, and his eyes swept me. "Yes. He must have."

"This college would probably have the same problem as the last one did."I frowned, "What's that?""Homework."
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