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"NIHILIST, n. A Russian who denies the existence of anything but Tolstoi. The leader of the school is Tolstoi."
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Personal Development
"Hurry, your imaginary heaven is calling you up, my dear holier-than-thou religious nuts."
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Personal Development
"And his computer's spell-check always forces him to capitalize the word "Internet". Come on; World War Two earned it's capitalization. The Internet just sucks human beings away from reality."
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"Happiness is a good business these days, more you talk crap about happiness the large number of crowd you will gather."
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"Blessed are the meek, for to them we shall say 'attaboy'."
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Personal Development
"It is difficult not to write satire."
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Personal Development
"Logically enough, the office and the nunnery have been singularly popular in the imaginations of pornographers. We should not be surprised to learn that the erotic novels of the early modern period were overwhelmingly focused on debauchery and flagellation amongst clergy in vespers and chapels, just as contemporary Internet pornography is inordinately concerned with fellatios and sodomies performed by office workers against a backdrop of work stations and computer equipment."
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"Cervantes smiled Spain's chivalry away; A single laugh demolished the right arm Of his country."
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Personal Development
"Pray don't talk to me about the weather, Mr. Worthing. Whenever people talk to me about the weather, I always feel quite certain that they mean something else. And that makes me quite nervous."
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"Punctuality is the thief of time."
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"I hate mankind, for I think myself one of the best of them, and I know how bad I am."
Self
"A wise man will make haste to forgive, because he knows the true value of time, and will not suffer it to pass away in unnecessary pain."
Time
"The happiest part of a man's life is what he passes lying awake in bed in the morning."
Life
"The two offices of memory are collection and distribution."
Memory
"There are goods so opposed that we cannot seize both, but, by too much prudence, may pass between them at too great a distance to reach either."
Decision-Making
"It is more from carelessness about truth than from intentionally lying that there is so much falsehood in the world."
Truth
"Resolve not to be poor: whatever you have, spend less. Poverty is a great enemy to human happiness; it certainly destroys liberty, and it makes some virtues impracticable, and others extremely difficult."
Happiness
"Subordination tends greatly to human happiness. Were we all upon an equality, we should have no other enjoyment than mere animal pleasure."
Happiness
"There is nothing which has yet been contrived by man, by which so much happiness is produced as by a good tavern."
Happiness
"The mind is never satisfied with the objects immediately before it, but is always breaking away from the present moment, and losing itself in schemes of future felicity... The natural flights of the human mind are not from pleasure to pleasure, but from hope to hope."
Hope
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